Received: from excasht01.ad.uow.edu.au ([10.5.102.10]) by anubis.ad.uow.edu.au with Microsoft SMTPSVC(6.0.3790.3959); Sun, 6 Jul 2008 09:26:16 +1000 Received: from beru.its.uow.edu.au (130.130.68.31) by staffmail.uow.edu.au (10.5.102.13) with Microsoft SMTP Server id 8.1.278.0; Sun, 6 Jul 2008 09:26:16 +1000 Received: from febris-nat.its.uow.edu.au ([130.130.68.210] helo=febris.its.uow.edu.au) by beru.its.uow.edu.au with esmtp (Exim 4.69) (envelope-from ) id 1KFH8y-0004nW-45 for blane@uow.edu.au; Sun, 06 Jul 2008 09:26:16 +1000 Received: from c3.confirmedcc.com (c3.confirmedcc.com [64.95.77.164]) by febris.its.uow.edu.au (MOS 3.8.7a) with ESMTP id LZO74894; Sun, 6 Jul 2008 09:26:12 +1000 (EST) Received: from p1-ws008 (unknown [10.250.0.101]) by c3.confirmedcc.com (Postfix) with ESMTP id A9F5223000E for ; Sat, 5 Jul 2008 19:26:09 -0400 (EDT) From: Fatherhood Foundation To: Brian Lane Date: Sun, 6 Jul 2008 09:26:09 +1000 Subject: I want to know what Love is Thread-Topic: I want to know what Love is Thread-Index: Acje9oWDoYM4L7bFQluouBl5d1Z35Q== Message-ID: <1102158468486.1101938345415.1211.8.97192502@scheduler> List-Unsubscribe: http://visitor.constantcontact.com/d.jsp?p=un&v=001jm8CFGIzLJHYg-gJRLc-3d90mBLDU8ykLP4RdoIiPyta4W4a0L_sbg== Reply-To: "info@fathersonline.org" Accept-Language: en-AU, en-US Content-Language: en-US X-MS-Has-Attach: X-MS-TNEF-Correlator: Content-Type: multipart/alternative; boundary="_000_110215846848611019383454151211897192502scheduler_" MIME-Version: 1.0 --_000_110215846848611019383454151211897192502scheduler_ Content-Type: text/plain; charset="iso-8859-1" Content-Transfer-Encoding: quoted-printable [http://origin.ih.constantcontact.com/fs007/1101938345415/img/11.jpg?a=3D11= 02158468486] 7th July 2008 Inspiring Fathers Encouraging Families Issue 307 [http://img.constantcontact.com/letters/images/1101093164665/people3_header= 1.jpg] I wanna' know what love is. Dear Brian, Welcome to the Fatherhood Foundation newsletter and email information servi= ce for the fathers and families as we present knowing what love is.. In This Issue Frontline...I wanna know what love is. Laughter..Ramblings of a Retired Mind Grandfathers...Recognising Love Single Dads...A tough decision All You Need is Love..To have and to hold Special Feature...Seein' my Father in me News & Info..News Links for Parents Dad's Prayer..Help me enjoy every moment Next Week Time is Money Join our Mailing List! [http://img.constantcontact.com/ui/images1/ftf_btn_1.gif] Quick Links Fatherhood Foundation Dads in Distress Focus on the Family National Centre for Fathering Oz Family Life Dads Uni Men of Integrity Lifeline Equal Parenting Party CSA Adverts Thought of the Week [http://origin.ih.constantcontact.com/fs007/1101938345415/img/292.jpg?a=3D1= 102158468486]The time is here for me to leave this life... I have done my best in this race... I have fought the good fight to the end... And now there is waiting for me a prize of victory... Not only to me, but to all those who wait with love. Jane McGrath 1966-2008 Frontline 'I wanna know what love is' is the name of the [htt= p://origin.ih.constantcontact.com/fs007/1101938345415/img/295.jpg?a=3D11021= 58468486] much recorded song by Foreigner. The song was a massive No 1 hit = in both the UK and the USA in 1985 and still touches a chord today. It was = Foreigner's biggest song by far. Maybe it is the gritty realism of the lyri= cs that touches people's hearts. I'm gonna take a little time A little time to look around me I've got nowhere left to hide It looks like love has finally found me In my life there's been heartache and pain I don't know if I can face it again I can't stop now, I've traveled so far To change this lonely life I wanna know what love is I want you to show me I wanna feel what love is I know you can show me. I will never forget the first Fatherhood Forum, 10th February 2003, which t= he Fatherhood Foundation organized at Parliament House. About 25 key leader= s from within the men and fathers movement gathered, as well as academics a= nd pro-family groups. Each of the men talked for 5 minutes each about their= hopes, dreams and disappointments. It was honest, hopeful and encouraging = but most of all it was heart-breaking listening to what some of the dads ha= d been through for one reason or another. Some of the men couldn't even fin= ish their talks because of the pain and emotion involved. Later in the afternoon of the Fatherhood Forum we began to work on some pol= icy suggestions which eventually became 'The 12pt Plan'. There were a few heated moments and a very broad range of voices whic= h at times seemed almost confusing. Don Bowak, an elder in the men's moveme= nt from Men's Health and Wellbeing asked me with a somewhat exasperate= d and quizzical look, at the end of the day, "What are you trying to do." M= y answer was simple, "We are trying to find out what love is all about." In many ways this is the question of human existence. That is why Foreigner= 's song was the huge hit that it was. The scary thing is that love is usua= lly staring at us from the other side of the kitchen table every day of the= week. However many of us run from it because it is simply too much, too cl= ose and too 'all the time'. True love is very confronting. Marriage is often referred to as 'wedlock'. That is like locking the door o= f the furnace of love. Many times it just gets too hot to handle. Joan Craw= ford said, "Love is a fire. But whether it is going to warm your hearth or = burn down your house, you never can tell." The key is to lock the door of t= he furnace with heartfelt commitment when you say those magical words 'I do= ' and then be prepared to melt together until the two do indeed become one.= The journey of love will take a lifetime! Peter De Vries words spring to mind, "The value of marriage is not that adu= lts produce children but that children produce adults." I remember when I once asked at a seminar, "What is love?" a woman spoke up= and said, "Love is being committed to being committed." So often, women se= em better able to articulate such things than men. Such a woman was Jane McGrath, wife of famous [http://origin.ih.constantcon= tact.com/fs007/1101938345415/img/304.jpg?a=3D1102158468486] cricketer Glenn= McGrath, who recently died of breast cancer on 22nd June 2008. Mr Rudd, Pr= ime Minister, said, "She was an inspiring woman." Mr Nelson, Opposition Lea= der, said, "Jane McGrath was a woman much to be admired and much loved." Ja= ne and Glenn set up the McGrath Foundation to help women with brea= st cancer. Jane's main desire in life was to grow old with her husband Glen= n. Unfortunately this was not to be. It was the words that Jane wrote for h= er own funeral that really touched Australia. Kellie, her friend, read them= out. "The time is here for me to leave this life. I have fought the good fight t= o the end, I have done my best in this race, I have run the full distance a= nd I have kept the faith, and now there is waiting for me a prize of victor= y awarded for the righteous life, the prize which the Lord, the righteous j= udge, will give me on that day - not only to me, but to all those who wait = with love." Lovework Love those around your own table and then love those on the other side of t= he world as well. If you can do the first, the second will be easy. Yours for the journey of love Warwick Marsh PS The Fatherhood Foundation would like to say a big thank you to the many = supporters who gave anywhere between $10 and $500 for our end of year finan= cial appeal. To date $3,120 has been raised, for which we are profoundly gr= ateful. The children we help will be grateful too! ____________________________________________________________________ Warwick Marsh has been married to Alison for 32 years. He is the grandfath= er of two children and father of five children, four boys and one girl, ran= ging in age from 27 years to 15 years. Warwick is a musician, songwriter, = producer and public speaker who likes to think he can still laugh at himsel= f. Laughter [http://origin.ih.constantcontact.com/fs007/1101938345415/img/296.j= pg?a=3D1102158468486] I was thinking about how a status symbol of today is those cell phones that= everyone has clipped onto their belt or purse. I can't afford one. So, I= 'm wearing my garage door opener. You know, I spent a fortune on deodorant before I realized that people didn= 't like me anyway. I was thinking that women should put pictures of missing husbands on beer c= ans! I was thinking about old age and decided that old age is 'when you still ha= ve something on the ball, but you are just too tired to bounce it.' I thought about making a fitness movie, for folks my age, and call it 'Pump= ing Rust.' I have gotten that dreaded furniture disease. That's when your chest is fal= ling into your drawers! I know, when people see a cat's litter box, they always say, 'Oh, have you= got a cat?' Just once I want to say, 'No, it's for company!' Employment application blanks always ask 'who is to be notified in case of = an emergency.' I think you should write, 'A Good Doctor!' Why do they put pictures of criminals up in the Post Office? What are we s= upposed to do... write to these men? Why don't they just put their picture= s on the postage stamps so the mailmen could look for them while they deliv= er the mail? Or better yet, arrest them while they are taking their pictu= res! I was thinking about how people seem to read the Bible a whole lot more as = they get older. Then, it dawned on me, they were cramming for their finals. 'When you have a lot of things to do, it's best to get your nap out of the = way first.' Grandfathers [http://origin.ih.constantcontact.com/fs007/1101938345415/img/297.jpg?a=3D1= 102158468486] It's so easy To think about love To talk about love To wish for love But it's not always easy To recognize love Even when we hold it . . . In our hand. Jaka Single Dads A tough decision Lance migrated to Canada in early 1993.[http://origin.ih.constantcontact.co= m/fs007/1101938345415/img/301.jpg?a=3D1102158468486] His heart was broken. = He had to leave his only child, a four month old son named Michael. Michael= was born in November 1992. "The opportunity presented itself and I thought= I would be able to provide in a much better way for my son if I go off to = seemingly greener pastures", Lance says. Lance and Michael's mother were separated prior to their son being born. Ho= wever, he says they were very civil towards each other and had a very good = friendship, during her pregnancy. Stacy's family was not pleased with the s= ituation, and neither were they pleased with Lance. It was her family that = encouraged her to make the choice of not continuing the intimate relationsh= ip with Lance. Stacey's mother was pretty upset. Lance was away in another parish working when Michael was born. He knew of = Michael's birth the day after he was born. There were no cell phones at tha= t time, so he was not able to be alerted to Stacy's time of labor and witne= ss the birth of his firstborn. Lance offered to send Stacy to evening class= es to achieve more O'Level and A' Level subjects while he takes care of Mic= hael. According to Lance, Stacy's mother was resolute in the decision for S= tacy not to 'give the child away'. Lance says those words struck a chord of= sadness for him because he did not consider Stacy giving the child away; a= fter all, he was the child's father. It was a hard pill to swallow. Needles= s to say, Stacy listened to her family and so the relationship was disconti= nued. He was still able to see his child as he wanted to be involved in Mic= hael's life. However, he had an opportunity to go to Canada to make a bette= r life for himself, and ultimately his child. He decided to go. He took his son Lance was in Canada for two and a half years before he was able to go back = home to see his son again. During that time, he worked hard and was able to= send at least 80 percent of his paycheck home every month to Stacy to aid = in the care of his son. He had opened a bank account for Michael and establ= ished Stacy's mother as the proxy on the account. He would send the monies = directly to Stacy or the grandmother for them to use in whatever capacity t= o provide the proper care for Michael. He would also purchase clothing, toy= s and other necessities and ship to Jamaica for his son. Lance was determin= ed to provide the best for his son and to care for him in any way he can. H= e also called as often as he could, write letters and send pictures of hims= elf, so Michael could know who his father was. Lance was finally able to ma= ke it home in 1995, which was 2 years after he first left for Canada. He wa= s excited! He would be able to see his son. Will he know who I am? Will he = recognize my voice? Lance was both nervous and excited because he realized = his son would be 2 =BD years older than when he last saw him. Lance did not like what he discovered. He was dismayed when he found out Mi= chael was hospitalized due to drinking a dangerous household chemical. He a= lso had scars and bruises on his little body, torn and tattered clothes and= does not seem to be supervised or well taken care of. Lance was appalled a= t the living conditions. He did not make any fuss. But Lance was heartbroke= n. Lance quickly made the decision that he was going to take Michael with h= im to Canada. He left for Canada and immediately began working on processin= g the papers that would allow him to take his son into the country. The pro= cess was finalized in 1997. He was relieved when Stacy and family signed th= e papers also. He immediately flew to Jamaica and took his son with him to = Canada in mid 1997. Raising Michael Lance says it was not easy being a single dad. He could not afford a babysi= tter, but Lance refused to allow his mother to take care of Michael. Lance'= s mother and siblings were residing in Canada, but he refused to burden his= mother with the care of his child. He insisted that his mother had raised = all her children and it would be unfair for her to raise her children's chi= ldren. Michael came to Canada at the end of the school year, so he was not = immediately enrolled in school. During the summer, Lance worked with the tr= ucking company, as he was seeking to establish his own trucking business. H= e would pack Michael's little lunch box and would take Michael as early as = 4 am in the mornings to work with him. If it was cold, Lance would wrap him= up in thick blankets and ensure that his truck is warm enough for Michael.= Lance also cooked their meals most evenings when he got home from work. Mi= chael went everywhere with Lance. He taught him how to ride a bicycle, how = to have socially acceptable behaviors and most importantly, taught him to r= espect people. Sometimes he would leave Michael with his next door neighbor= , an old woman, but she was not able to assist him in preparing him for his= school years. Lance had to shoulder the responsibility and began teaching = him his ABC's. In retrospect, Lance says it was tough, but he never really thought about h= ow difficult it was, as he knew this was something he had to do. Michael wa= s his responsibility. He knew it was going to be challenging raising Michae= l by himself, without Michael's mother's help. But he was comforted knowing= that he could do a better job than Stacy was doing with Michael. He knew M= ichael would be supervised properly and would be eating nutritious meals. My Mentor and Influence Michael is now fifteen years old, and in the teenage years. Lance is gratef= ul that he was able to raise him to make the right choices. He knew that Mi= chael could be involved in drugs and make other socially incorrect choices,= but he is grateful that so far he is heading in the right direction. His p= roudest moment was last year when he attended Michael's graduation from Mid= dle School. Michael wrote his dad a letter stating that 'You are my mentor = and influence. I want to be like you when I grow up'. When he thought of hi= s decision to take Michael and raise him by himself, Lance says he would do= it all over again in a heartbeat. He only would do things a little differe= ntly at times. He says it is still a challenge at every stage of his son's = growth, and he finds the teen years a little bit more difficult, but he kno= ws they will make it. (A true story. Names are changed to protect identity) A Jamaican Single Dad's Reflection-A Father's Day Special By D Campbell Published May 31, 2008 All You Need is Love To Have and To Hold[http://origin.ih.constantcontact.com/fs007/110193834541= 5/img/299.jpg?a=3D1102158468486] How often have we heard those classic words from the silver screen or at a = church wedding! At its most basic, "To Have and To Hold" refers to the phy= sical embrace of husband and wife. "To have" is to receive without reservat= ion the total self-gift of the other. It's not a statement of ownership, bu= t rather a promise of unconditional acceptance. "To Hold" is a pledge of ph= ysical affection and tenderness, a vow to be available to the other in body= and soul, a promise to cherish, value and protect the other as we would a = prized treasure. "To have and to hold..." is truly beautiful poetry, loaded with meaning and= significance. But it is not just nice poetry. It is also sage advice. Too often when marriages come under stress, we stop 'having' and we stop 'h= olding'. We put conditions on the other's acceptability and we put limits o= n our 'presence' (including physical availability). And yet, when one or th= e other is feeling fragile, wounded, stressed or isolated, there is nothing= that can soften the heart and kindle the soul more effectively that the ge= nuine openness and physical affection of the beloved. For a wife, her husband's strong loving arms encircling her communicates se= curity, reassurance, stability, confidence. So often when she pushes her hu= sband away with nagging or irritability, she is subconsciously crying out f= or him to rescue her from herself. She needs to know that he is a man who c= an withstand the storms of her emotions and be refuge to whom she can flee = when she is overwhelmed. For a husband, the open, respectful affection of his wife reaches deep into= his psyche, empowering him and drawing him towards self-sacrificing love. = A husband is never more alive in his masculinity than when he is secure in = the knowledge of his ability to serve and pleasure his wife. When he withdr= aws from the relationship, he does so not to punish her, but to protect him= self from the shame of her rejection and his failure to please her. To have and to hold... Five simple words: eloquent poetry with a profound m= essage. =A9 2008 PMRC Australia. Authors: Francine & Byron Pirola www.CelebrateLove.com.au Special Feature Seein' My Father in Me (Pt 2) By Coach Dave Daubenmire June 19, 2008 NewsWithViews.com[http://origin.ih.constantcontact.com/fs007/= 1101938345415/img/300.jpg?a=3D1102158468486] I'm seein' my father in me. I guess that's how it's meant to be And I find I'm more and more like him each day I notice I walk the way he walks. I notice I talk the way he talks I'm startin' to see my father in me. Paul Overstreet I just celebrated the third Father's Day since the death of my dad. He was = a good ole boy, my father, Frank. Raised in the days of the Great Depression, one of eight children, Dad's te= enage desire was to play for the New York Yankees. But like so many of his = generation, those dreams were exploded by the bombing of Pearl Harbor, foll= owed by marriage and childbirth, and a lifetime of enjoying the grandchildr= en we had given him. That was his reward... But the reason I am writing this is because I know that my story is such a = common one. All fathers leave a footprint. Some become monuments...others b= ecome wounds. Some men search their whole lives for the approval of Dad. What kind of footprint are you leaving? I remember the fearful joy that Michele and I had when we took our first ch= ild home. Now what? How does a father behave? What does a father do? It sho= cked me one afternoon to hear myself say to my son my Dad's favorite warnin= g, "I ain't telling you no more." "Wow," I thought. "I'm becoming my dad." It is a powerful influence, a fath= er's footprint. Are you becoming your dad? Are you "more and more like him each day?" Is th= at a good thing? As I look back over my life I can't remember a single conversation I ever h= ad with my earthly father about the great issues of life. We spoke of the Y= ankees...or the Reds...or of the latest catfish...but he never showed me hi= s soul. He never spoke to me of the importance of his faith. When I was thirty-five years old I gave my life to Jesus. He came into my l= ife and he began to Father me. He showed me what it meant to be a man. I be= gan to understand the importance of my influence in the spiritual life of m= y children. I remember a conversation I had with one of my good friends. He was not a C= hristian but had great respect for my walk. In a private moment he shared w= ith me that he could not get his son thirteen-year old son to go to church. "Should I call the pastor and have him speak to Jake?" He asked me. "Nah," I answered. "I have a better idea. Why don't you take him to church = rather than send him? If it matters to you...it will matter to him. If it d= oesn't, it won't." Today they are both actively serving the Lord. Men have dropped the ball. We have asked others to impart to our children w= hat they can only receive from Dad. "Boy, Dave, you look like your father," I often hear my parents' friends sa= y. "Which one?" I ask. "My earthly father or my Heavenly Father?" I pray they see both. Frank gave me life, Jesus taught me the meaning of it= . When your kids look at you, Dad, which Father do they see? "I notice I walk= the way he walks. I notice I talk the way he talks. I'm startin' to see my= father in me." The title Father conjures up so many different thoughts. For some of us it = is good, while others hate the "old man." Did you ever stop to think that t= he footprint you leave will impact the way your children view their Heavenl= y Father? When your children hear the word father what image do they get? A= re you a faithful father or a deadly dad? Thanks, Opie Frank, for a model of love. You did what you knew to do. Watch this...it will make you cry. I'm seein' both my fathers in me! =A9 2008 Dave Daubenmire - All Rights Reserved News & Info News Links for Parents[http://origin.ih.constantcontact.com/fs007/110193834= 5415/img/159.jpg?a=3D1102158468486] Parents sending Kids to School in nappies Pregnant man gives birth "Our situation sparks legal, political, and social unknowns," Mr Beat= ie wrote, adding the couple had experienced opposition from health care pro= fessionals, friends and family. How to Fly with Children and Survive __________________________________________________ 2008 Hillsong Conference July 7-11 Sydney Australia This conference is not for the weak or fainthearted, yet it will encourage = and raise those who are to 'be strong and of exceptional courage'. For over= 20 years the testimony of this gathering, has been churches, teams and ind= ividuals whose 'rising' has radically changed the world they influence. Hillsong NIGHTS is going to be phenomenal with an amazing atmosphere of fai= th & celebration featuring some of the world's greatest teachers & worship = leaders. More information and Register here _____________________ Letters[http://origin.ih.constantcontact.com/fs007/1101938345415/img/302.jp= g?a=3D1102158468486] Dear Fatherhood Foundation, Well done for the strength and courage you have demonstrated in building re= lationships with the men in your sphere of influence, and modelling to them= integrity and authenticity. I've said it before... you're a pioneer! I am pleased to advise your readers that we have now launched our ministry = / organization, called Fathering Adventures... www.fatheringadventures.com.= au Please take a little time to explore our website= , and write back with any questions or comments that you may have. Our inaugural 5-night father-son adventure is being held from Saturday afte= rnoon, September 27th, to Thursday morning, October 2nd, this year. The min= imum age requirement for the "sons" is 14 years, and there is no upper age = limit. We are limiting these 5-night adventures to a maximum of 12 father &= son pairs. Once again, far more detail can be found at our website. Please= share this correspondence with all the fathers you know, to ensure that Fa= thering Adventures continues to flourish, and succeed in turning the hearts= of fathers to their children, and the hearts of children to their fathers.= .. Boys and young men being ushered into authentic manhood. Thank you Warwick and to your team at the Fatherhood Foundation for your ti= me and your assistance along the way. I look forward to corresponding with = you further, in our common quest to help men become all that they were crea= ted to be. Strength and Honour, Darren Lewis Fathering Adventures [http://orig= in.ih.constantcontact.com/fs007/1101938345415/img/303.jpg?a=3D1102158468486= ] Ph: (07) 4723 2941 Fax: (07) 4723 2941 Mob: 0431 839 035 email: info@fatheringadventures.com.au web: www.fatheringadventures.com.au Dad's Prayer Dear God [http://origin.ih.constantcontact.com/fs007/1101938345415/img/294.jpg?a=3D1= 102158468486]Jane McGrath was quite a woman. I'm sure You will welcome her but she will be sadly missed. Help us heed Glenn's words: "I never took for granted The time I had with Jan And if there is one thing That can be drawn from her life Is that everyday was a blessing." Help me enjoy the blessings of my family. Help me enjoy each moment of every day. Help Us! The Fatherhood Foundation is a Harm Prevention Charity. Fatherlessness and inadequate fathering has been proven to be a source of h= arm. The Fatherhood Foundation helps children by promoting excellence in f= athering. Excellent fathers are in word and deed: responsible, involved, pr= otective, loving and committed to the well-being of their children and thei= r children's mother. If you would like to give financially to the Fatherhood Foundation Public F= und and receive tax deductibility: Fatherhood Foundation Public Fund (Name, address and amount details must be emailed for a receipt for tax ded= uctibility) Westpac Branch Wollongong DONATE ONLINE BSB: 032 695 A/C: 25-5558 Or mail cheque and address details to: PO Box 542 UNANDERRA NSW 2526 AUSTRALIA The Fatherhood Foundation Public Fund is a public fund listed on the Regis= ter of Harm Prevention Charities under Subdivision 30_EA of the Income Tax = Assessment Act 1997. You have received the fathersonline.org newsletter because you have subscri= bed, or you have been subscribed by a friend. If you do not wish to receiv= e future emails, please click the UNSUBSCRIBE button below. Forward email [http://img.constantcontact.com/letters/images/safe_unsubscribe_logo.gif] This email was sent to blane@uow.edu.au, by info@fathersonline.org Update Profile/Email Address | Instant removal with SafeUnsubscribe(tm) | Pri= vacy Policy. Email Marketing= by [http://img.constantcontact.com/letters/images/cc-logo-color-sm.gif] Fatherhood Foundation | P.O. Box 542 | Unanderra | NSW | 2526 | Australia --_000_110215846848611019383454151211897192502scheduler_ Content-Type: text/html; charset="iso-8859-1" Content-Transfer-Encoding: quoted-printable
=09
3D"FF
=09
=09
=09 = =09 =09 =09
7th July 2008   &= nbsp;     Inspiring Fathers&n= bsp; Encouraging Families Issue 307
I wanna' know what love is. 
Dear Brian,

Welc= ome to the Fatherhood Foundation newsletter and email information service f= or the fathers and families as we present knowing what love is..

=09
In This Issue
Frontline...I wanna know what love is.
Laughter..Ramblings of a Retired Mind
Grandfathers...Recognising Love
Single Dads...A tough decision
All You Need is Love..To have and to hold
Special Feature...Seein' my Father in me
News & Info..News Links for Parents
Dad's Prayer..Help me enjoy every moment
Next Week&nb= sp;
 Time= is Money
 =09 =09
 
Join our Mailing List!
 
Quick Links

Thought of the Week

3D"JaneTh= e time is here for me to leave this life...
I have done my best in thi= s race...
I have fought the good fight to the end...
And now ther= e is waiting for me a prize of victory...
Not only to me, but to all t= hose who wait with love.
 
Jane McGrath 1966-2008 
Frontline
 
<= /font>'I wanna know what love is' is the name of the 3D"Janemuch recorded song by Foreigner. The song was a massive No 1 hit= in both the UK and the USA in 1985 and still touches a chord today. It was= Foreigner's biggest song by far. Maybe it is the gritty realism of the lyr= ics that touches people's hearts.
 
I'm gonna take a little = time
A little time to look around me
I've got nowhere left to hid= e
It looks like love has finally found me
 
In my life = there's been heartache and pain
I don't know if I can face it againI can't stop now, I've traveled so far
To change this lonely life 
I wanna know what love is
I want you to show me
I= wanna feel what love is
I know you can show me.
 
I wi= ll never forget the first Fatherhood Forum, 10th February 2003, which the F= atherhood Foundation organized at Parliament House. About 25 key leaders fr= om within the men and fathers movement gathered, as well as academics and p= ro-family groups. Each of the men talked for 5 minutes each about their hop= es, dreams and disappointments. It was honest, hopeful and encouraging but = most of all it was heart-breaking listening to what some of the dads had be= en through for one reason or another. Some of the men couldn't even finish = their talks because of the pain and emotion involved.
 
Late= r in the afternoon of the Fatherhood Forum we began to work on some policy = suggestions which eventually became 'The 12pt Plan'. There= were a few heated moments and a very broad range of voices which at times = seemed almost confusing. Don Bowak, an elder in the men's movement from Men's He= alth and Wellbeing asked me with a somewhat exasperated and quizzi= cal look, at the end of the day, "What are you trying to do." My answer was= simple, "We are trying to find out what love is all about."
 In many ways this is the question of human existence. That is why Foreig= ner's song was the huge hit that it was.  The scary thing is that love= is usually staring at us from the other side of the kitchen table every da= y of the week. However many of us run from it because it is simply too much= , too close and too 'all the time'. True love is very confronting.
&n= bsp;
Marriage is often referred to as 'wedlock'. That is like locking = the door of the furnace of love. Many times it just gets too hot to handle.= Joan Crawford said, "Love is a fire. But whether it is going to warm your = hearth or burn down your house, you never can tell." The key is to lock the= door of the furnace with heartfelt commitment when you say those magical w= ords 'I do' and then be prepared to melt together until the two do indeed b= ecome one. The journey of love will take a lifetime!
 
Peter= De Vries words spring to mind, "The value of marriage is not that adults p= roduce children but that children produce adults."
 
I remem= ber when I once asked at a seminar, "What is love?" a woman spoke up and sa= id, "Love is being committed to being committed." So often, women seem bett= er able to articulate such things than men.
 
Such a woman w= as Jane McGrath, wife of famous 3D"McGrathcricketer Glenn McGrath, who recently died of breast cancer on = 22nd June 2008. Mr Rudd, Prime Minister, said, "She was an inspiring woman.= " Mr Nelson, Opposition Leader, said, "Jane McGrath was a woman much to be = admired and much loved." Jane and Glenn set up the McGrath Foundation to= help women with breast cancer. Jane's main desire in life was to grow old = with her husband Glenn. Unfortunately this was not to be. It was the words = that Jane wrote for her own funeral that really touched Australia. Kellie, = her friend, read them out.
 
"The time is here for me to lea= ve this life. I have fought the good fight to the end, I have done my best = in this race, I have run the full distance and I have kept the faith, and n= ow there is waiting for me a prize of victory awarded for the righteous lif= e, the prize which the Lord, the righteous judge, will give me on that day = - not only to me, but to all those who wait with love."
 
Lovework

Love those around your own table and the= n love those on the other side of the world as well. If you can do the firs= t, the second will be easy.
 
Yours for the journey of love<= br />Warwick Marsh
 
PS The Fatherhood Foundation would like= to say a big thank you to the many supporters who gave anywhere between $1= 0 and $500 for our end of year financial appeal. To date $3,120 has been ra= ised, for which we are profoundly grateful. The children we help will be gr= ateful too!
__________________________________________________________= __________

Warwick Marsh  has been married to Alison for&nbs= p;32 years. He is the grandfather of two children and father of five childr= en, four boys and one girl, ranging in age from 27 years to 15 years.&= nbsp; Warwick is a musician, songwriter, producer and public speaker who li= kes to think he can still laugh at himself.
=
Laughter
=
 

        3D"Old

I was thinking about how a status symbol of today is those cell phones = that everyone has clipped onto their belt or purse.  I can't afford on= e.  So, I'm wearing my garage door opener.

You know, I spe= nt a fortune on deodorant before I realized that people didn't like me anyw= ay.

I was thinking that women should put pictures of missing hu= sbands on beer cans!

I was thinking about old age and decided that old age is 'when you st= ill have something on the ball, but you are just too tired to bounce it.' <= br />
I thought about making a fitness movie, for folks my age, and ca= ll it 'Pumping Rust.'

I have gotten that dreaded furniture dise= ase. That's when your chest is falling into your drawers!

I kno= w, when people see a cat's litter box,  they always say, 'Oh, have you= got a cat?'
Just once I want to say,  'No, it's for company!' <= br />
Employment application blanks always ask 'who is to be notified = in case of an emergency.'   I think you should write, 'A Good Doctor!'=

Why do they put pictures of criminals up in the Post Office? &= nbsp;What are we supposed to do... write to these men?  Why don't they= just put their pictures on the postage stamps so the mailmen could look fo= r them while they deliver the mail?   Or better yet, arrest them while= they are taking their pictures!

I was thinking about how peopl= e seem to read the Bible a whole lot more as they get older. Then, it dawne= d on me, they were cramming for their finals. 

'When you ha= ve a lot of things to do, it's best to get your nap out of the way first.' =
Grandfathers

3D"Hand = ;  It's so easy
To think about love
To talk about love
To wi= sh for love
But it's not always easy
To recognize love
Even = when we hold it . . .
In our hand.
 
Jaka

Single Dads
A tough decision
 
Lance migrated to Cana= da in early 1993.3D"Lance_son" His hea= rt was broken. He had to leave his only child, a four month old son named M= ichael. Michael was born in November 1992. "The opportunity presented itsel= f and I thought I would be able to provide in a much better way for my son = if I go off to seemingly greener pastures", Lance says.
 
La= nce and Michael's mother were separated prior to their son being born. Howe= ver, he says they were very civil towards each other and had a very good fr= iendship, during her pregnancy. Stacy's family was not pleased with the sit= uation, and neither were they pleased with Lance. It was her family that en= couraged her to make the choice of not continuing the intimate relationship= with Lance. Stacey's mother was pretty upset.
 
Lance was a= way in another parish working when Michael was born. He knew of Michael's b= irth the day after he was born. There were no cell phones at that time, so = he was not able to be alerted to Stacy's time of labor and witness the birt= h of his firstborn. Lance offered to send Stacy to evening classes to achie= ve more O'Level and A' Level subjects while he takes care of Michael. Accor= ding to Lance, Stacy's mother was resolute in the decision for Stacy not to= 'give the child away'. Lance says those words struck a chord of sadness fo= r him because he did not consider Stacy giving the child away; after all, h= e was the child's father. It was a hard pill to swallow. Needless to say, S= tacy listened to her family and so the relationship was discontinued. He wa= s still able to see his child as he wanted to be involved in Michael's life= . However, he had an opportunity to go to Canada to make a better life for = himself, and ultimately his child. He decided to go.
 
He took his son
 
Lance was in Canada for two an= d a half years before he was able to go back home to see his son again. Dur= ing that time, he worked hard and was able to send at least 80 percent of h= is paycheck home every month to Stacy to aid in the care of his son. He had= opened a bank account for Michael and established Stacy's mother as the pr= oxy on the account. He would send the monies directly to Stacy or the grand= mother for them to use in whatever capacity to provide the proper care for = Michael. He would also purchase clothing, toys and other necessities and sh= ip to Jamaica for his son. Lance was determined to provide the best for his= son and to care for him in any way he can. He also called as often as he c= ould, write letters and send pictures of himself, so Michael could know who= his father was. Lance was finally able to make it home in 1995, which was = 2 years after he first left for Canada. He was excited! He would be able to= see his son. Will he know who I am? Will he recognize my voice? Lance was = both nervous and excited because he realized his son would be 2 =BD years o= lder than when he last saw him.
 
Lance did not like what he= discovered. He was dismayed when he found out Michael was hospitalized due= to drinking a dangerous household chemical. He also had scars and bruises = on his little body, torn and tattered clothes and does not seem to be super= vised or well taken care of. Lance was appalled at the living conditions. H= e did not make any fuss. But Lance was heartbroken. Lance quickly made the = decision that he was going to take Michael with him to Canada. He left for = Canada and immediately began working on processing the papers that would al= low him to take his son into the country. The process was finalized in 1997= . He was relieved when Stacy and family signed the papers also. He immediat= ely flew to Jamaica and took his son with him to Canada in mid 1997.
&= nbsp;
Raising Michael
 
Lance says it = was not easy being a single dad. He could not afford a babysitter, but Lanc= e refused to allow his mother to take care of Michael. Lance's mother and s= iblings were residing in Canada, but he refused to burden his mother with t= he care of his child. He insisted that his mother had raised all her childr= en and it would be unfair for her to raise her children's children. Michael= came to Canada at the end of the school year, so he was not immediately en= rolled in school. During the summer, Lance worked with the trucking company= , as he was seeking to establish his own trucking business. He would pack M= ichael's little lunch box and would take Michael as early as 4 am in the mo= rnings to work with him. If it was cold, Lance would wrap him up in thick b= lankets and ensure that his truck is warm enough for Michael. Lance also co= oked their meals most evenings when he got home from work. Michael went eve= rywhere with Lance. He taught him how to ride a bicycle, how to have social= ly acceptable behaviors and most importantly, taught him to respect people.= Sometimes he would leave Michael with his next door neighbor, an old woman= , but she was not able to assist him in preparing him for his school years.= Lance had to shoulder the responsibility and began teaching him his ABC's.=
 
In retrospect, Lance says it was tough, but he never real= ly thought about how difficult it was, as he knew this was something he had= to do. Michael was his responsibility. He knew it was going to be challeng= ing raising Michael by himself, without Michael's mother's help. But he was= comforted knowing that he could do a better job than Stacy was doing with = Michael. He knew Michael would be supervised properly and would be eating n= utritious meals.
 
My Mentor and Influence
 
Michael is now fifteen years old, and in the teenage years= . Lance is grateful that he was able to raise him to make the right choices= . He knew that Michael could be involved in drugs and make other socially i= ncorrect choices, but he is grateful that so far he is heading in the right= direction. His proudest moment was last year when he attended Michael's gr= aduation from Middle School. Michael wrote his dad a letter stating that 'Y= ou are my mentor and influence. I want to be like you when I grow up'. When= he thought of his decision to take Michael and raise him by himself, Lance= says he would do it all over again in a heartbeat. He only would do things= a little differently at times. He says it is still a challenge at every st= age of his son's growth, and he finds the teen years a little bit more diff= icult, but he knows they will make it.
 
(A true story. Name= s are changed to protect identity)
A Jamaican Single Dad's Reflection-= A Father's Day Special
By D Campbell  Published May 31, 2008
All You Nee= d is Love
To Have and To Hold3D"Couple
 
How often have we heard those classic words from = the silver screen or at a church wedding!  At its most basic, "To Have= and To Hold" refers to the physical embrace of husband and wife. "To have"= is to receive without reservation the total self-gift of the other. It's n= ot a statement of ownership, but rather a promise of unconditional acceptan= ce. "To Hold" is a pledge of physical affection and tenderness, a vow to be= available to the other in body and soul, a promise to cherish, value and p= rotect the other as we would a prized treasure.
 
"To have a= nd to hold..." is truly beautiful poetry, loaded with meaning and significa= nce. But it is not just nice poetry. It is also sage advice.
 Too often when marriages come under stress, we stop 'having' and we sto= p 'holding'. We put conditions on the other's acceptability and we put limi= ts on our 'presence' (including physical availability). And yet, when one o= r the other is feeling fragile, wounded, stressed or isolated, there is not= hing that can soften the heart and kindle the soul more effectively that th= e genuine openness and physical affection of the beloved.
 
For a wife, her husband's strong loving arms encircling her communicates s= ecurity, reassurance, stability, confidence. So often when she pushes her h= usband away with nagging or irritability, she is subconsciously crying out = for him to rescue her from herself. She needs to know that he is a man who = can withstand the storms of her emotions and be refuge to whom she can flee= when she is overwhelmed.
 
For a husband, the open, respect= ful affection of his wife reaches deep into his psyche, empowering him and = drawing him towards self-sacrificing love. A husband is never more alive in= his masculinity than when he is secure in the knowledge of his ability to = serve and pleasure his wife. When he withdraws from the relationship, he do= es so not to punish her, but to protect himself from the shame of her rejec= tion and his failure to please her.
 
To have and to hold...= Five simple words: eloquent poetry with a profound message.
 =A9 2008 PMRC Australia. Authors: Francine & Byron Pirola
www.CelebrateLove.com.au <= /font>
=09
Special Feature
Seein' My Father in Me = (Pt 2)
By Coach Dave Daubenmire
June 19, 2008 NewsWithViews.com3D"Dad_Son"
 
 

 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
I'm seein' my father in me. I guess that's how it's meant to be
A= nd I find I'm more and more like him each day
I notice I walk the way = he walks. I notice I talk the way he talks
I'm startin' to see my fath= er in me. Paul Overstreet
I just celebrated the third Father's Day sin= ce the death of my dad. He was a good ole boy, my father, Frank.
Rais= ed in the days of the Great Depression, one of eight children, Dad's teenag= e desire was to play for the New York Yankees. But like so many of his gene= ration, those dreams were exploded by the bombing of Pearl Harbor, followed= by marriage and childbirth, and a lifetime of enjoying the grandchildren w= e had given him. That was his reward...
But the reason I am writing th= is is because I know that my story is such a common one. All fathers leave = a footprint. Some become monuments...others become wounds. Some men search = their whole lives for the approval of Dad.
What kind of footprint are = you leaving?
I remember the fearful joy that Michele and I had when we= took our first child home. Now what? How does a father behave? What does a= father do? It shocked me one afternoon to hear myself say to my son my Dad= 's favorite warning, "I ain't telling you no more."
"Wow," I thought.= "I'm becoming my dad." It is a powerful influence, a father's footprint.Are you becoming your dad? Are you "more and more like him each day?" I= s that a good thing?
As I look back over my life I can't remember a si= ngle conversation I ever had with my earthly father about the great issues = of life. We spoke of the Yankees...or the Reds...or of the latest catfish..= .but he never showed me his soul. He never spoke to me of the importance of= his faith.
When I was thirty-five years old I gave my life to Jesus. = He came into my life and he began to Father me. He showed me what it meant = to be a man. I began to understand the importance of my influence in the sp= iritual life of my children.
I remember a conversation I had with one = of my good friends. He was not a Christian but had great respect for my wal= k. In a private moment he shared with me that he could not get his son thir= teen-year old son to go to church.
"Should I call the pastor and have= him speak to Jake?" He asked me.
"Nah," I answered. "I have a better = idea. Why don't you take him to church rather than send him? If it matters = to you...it will matter to him. If it doesn't, it won't."
Today they a= re both actively serving the Lord.
Men have dropped the ball. We have = asked others to impart to our children what they can only receive from Dad.=
"Boy, Dave, you look like your father," I often hear my parents' frie= nds say. "Which one?" I ask. "My earthly father or my Heavenly Father?"
I pray they see both. Frank gave me life, Jesus taught me the meaning of = it.
When your kids look at you, Dad, which Father do they see? "I not= ice I walk the way he walks. I notice I talk the way he talks. I'm startin'= to see my father in me."
The title Father conjures up so many differe= nt thoughts. For some of us it is good, while others hate the "old man." Di= d you ever stop to think that the footprint you leave will impact the way y= our children view their Heavenly Father? When your children hear the word f= ather what image do they get? Are you a faithful father or a deadly dad? Thanks, Opie Frank, for a model of love. You did what you knew to do.Watch this...it will make you cry.
I'm seein' both my fathers in m= e!
=A9 2008 Dave Daubenmire - All Rights Reserved
 News & Info
=
 
News Links= for Parents3D"Man
 
 =20
= Pregnant man gives birth  "Our situation sparks le= gal, political, and social unknowns," Mr Beatie wrote, adding the couple ha= d experienced opposition from health care professionals, friends and family= . 
 
__________________________________________________&nb= sp;
 
2008 Hillsong Conference 
July 7-11 Sydney Australia
 =
This confere= nce is not for the weak or fainthearted, yet it will encourage and raise th= ose who are to 'be strong and of exceptional courage'. For over 20 years th= e testimony of this gathering, has been churches, teams and individuals who= se 'rising' has radically changed the world they influence.
 
Hillsong NIGHTS is going to be phenomenal with an amazing atmosphere of f= aith & celebration featuring some of the world's greatest teachers & worshi= p leaders.
_____________________
 
Letters3D"Fathering_Rapids"
 
Dear Fatherhood Foundation,=20
Well done for the strength and courage you have demonstrated in buildi= ng relationships with the men in your sphere of influence, and modelling to= them integrity and authenticity. I've said it before... you're a pioneer!<= br />I am pleased to advise your readers that we have now launched&nbs= p;our ministry / organization, called Fathering Adventures... www.fatheringadventures.com.au=   Please take a little time to explore our website, and write= back with any questions or comments that you may have.
Our inaug= ural 5-night father-son adventure is being held from Saturday afternoon, Se= ptember 27th, to Thursday morning, October 2nd, this year. The mi= nimum age requirement for the "sons" is 14 years, and there is no= upper age limit. We are limiting these 5-night adventures to a maximum of = 12 father & son pairs. Once again, far more detail can be found at our= website. Please share this correspondence with all the fathers you kn= ow, to ensure that Fathering Adventures continues to flourish, and suc= ceed in turning the hearts of fathers to their children, and the hearts of = children to their fathers... Boys and young men being ushered into authenti= c manhood.
Thank you Warwick and to your team at the Fatherhood Founda= tion for your time and your assistance along the way. I look forward t= o corresponding with you further, in our common quest to help men=  become all that they were created to be.
Strength and Honour, 
Darren Lewis
Fathering Adventures   &nb= sp;            =             &nb= sp;            =  3D"Fathering
P= h: (07) 4723 2941
Fax: (07) 4723 2941
Mob: 0431 839 035
e= mail:
info@fatheringadventures.com.au  
web: www.fatheringadventures.com.au  
   =             &nb= sp;      
 
=

Dad's Prayer

           &nbs= p;            &= nbsp;
Dear God
 
3D"JaneJane McGrath was quite a woman.
I'm sure You will= welcome her
but she will be sadly missed.
Help us heed Glenn's w= ords:
"I never took for granted
The time I had with Jan
And= if there is one thing
That can be drawn from her life
Is that ev= eryday was a blessing."
Help me enjoy=20
the blessings of my family.
Help me enjoy each moment of every da= y.
=09
=09
Help Us!

The Fatherhood Foundation is a Harm Pre= vention Charity.
Fatherlessness and inadequate fathering has been pro= ven to be a source of harm. The Fatherhood Foundation helps children b= y promoting excellence  in fathering. Excellent fathers are in word an= d deed: responsible, involved, protective, loving and committed to the well= -being of their children and their children's mother.

 

If you would like to give financially t= o the Fatherhood Foundation Public Fund and receive tax deductibility:

 

Fatherhood Found= ation Public Fund
(Name, address and amount details must be = emailed for a receipt for tax deductibility)

 


Westpac Branch Wollon= gong            = ;         DONATE ONLINE


BSB: 032 695
A/C: 25-5558
 

Or mail cheque and address details to:<= br />PO Box 542
UNANDERRA  NSW&nbs= p; 2526
AUSTRALIA

 

The Fatherhood Foundation Public Fund&n= bsp; is a public fund listed on the Register of Harm Prevention Charities u= nder Subdivision 30_EA of the Income Tax Assessment Act 1997.=

 

You have received the fatherson= line.org newsletter because you have subscribed, or you have been = subscribed by a friend.  If you do not wish to receive future emails, = please click the UNSUBSCRIBE button below.

=09
=09
=09
3D"Safe
This email was sent to blane@uow.edu.au, by i= nfo@fathersonline.org
Fatherhood Foundati= on | P.O. Box 542 | Unanderra | NSW | 2526 | Australia
--_000_110215846848611019383454151211897192502scheduler_--