Received: from excasht03.ad.uow.edu.au ([10.5.102.140]) by anubis.ad.uow.edu.au with Microsoft SMTPSVC(6.0.3790.3959); Sun, 29 Jun 2008 07:31:30 +1000 Received: from beru.its.uow.edu.au (130.130.68.31) by staffmail.uow.edu.au (10.5.102.13) with Microsoft SMTP Server id 8.1.278.0; Sun, 29 Jun 2008 07:31:30 +1000 Received: from febris-nat.its.uow.edu.au ([130.130.68.210] helo=febris.its.uow.edu.au) by beru.its.uow.edu.au with esmtp (Exim 4.69) (envelope-from ) id 1KCi14-0006nF-Er for blane@uow.edu.au; Sun, 29 Jun 2008 07:31:30 +1000 Received: from c3.confirmedcc.com (c3.confirmedcc.com [64.95.77.164]) by febris.its.uow.edu.au (MOS 3.8.7a) with ESMTP id LUQ46190; Sun, 29 Jun 2008 07:31:26 +1000 (EST) Received: from p1-ws008 (unknown [10.250.0.101]) by c3.confirmedcc.com (Postfix) with ESMTP id 3A84898DEB for ; Sat, 28 Jun 2008 21:31:25 +0000 (UTC) From: Fatherhood Foundation To: Brian Lane Date: Sun, 29 Jun 2008 07:31:25 +1000 Subject: The Things that Matter Thread-Topic: The Things that Matter Thread-Index: AcjZZlSQ87FekdXNQH2R1tJmJZD3RA== Message-ID: <1102143873228.1101938345415.1211.8.98173002@scheduler> List-Unsubscribe: http://visitor.constantcontact.com/d.jsp?p=un&v=001jm8CFGIzLJHYg-gJRLc-3d90mBLDU8ykXJEkWSs_jRf3Xz4y8USXHg== Reply-To: "info@fathersonline.org" Accept-Language: en-AU, en-US Content-Language: en-AU X-MS-Has-Attach: X-MS-TNEF-Correlator: Content-Type: multipart/alternative; boundary="_000_110214387322811019383454151211898173002scheduler_" MIME-Version: 1.0 --_000_110214387322811019383454151211898173002scheduler_ Content-Type: text/plain; charset="iso-8859-1" Content-Transfer-Encoding: quoted-printable [http://origin.ih.constantcontact.com/fs007/1101938345415/img/11.jpg?a=3D11= 02143873228] 30th June 2008 Inspiring Fathers Encouraging Families Issue 306 [http://img.constantcontact.com/letters/images/1101093164665/people3_header= 1.jpg] The Things that Matter Dear Brian, Welcome to the Fatherhood Foundation newsletter and email information servi= ce for the fathers and families as we present the things that matter. In This Issue Frontline...The Things that Matter. Laughter..When Kid's Speak Grandfathers...I have Dream Single Dads...DIDS Media release All You Need is Love..Troubled Couples Rediscover their Marriage Special Feature...Wisdom of Martin Luther King News & Info..News Links for Parents Dad's Prayer..A Father's Dream Next Week 'I wanna know what love is' Join our Mailing List! [http://img.constantcontact.com/ui/images1/ftf_btn_1.gif] Quick Links Fatherhood Foundation Lone Fathers Fatherhood Project Fatherhood Institute UK Marriage Education 100 Good Men Salt Shakers Civitas UK Bruce Robinson CSA Adverts Thought of the Week [http://origin.ih.constantcontact.com/fs007/1101938345415/img/291.jpg?a=3D1= 102143873228]A nation that produces soft minded men purchases its own spiritual death on the instalment plan. Dr Martin Luther King Jr Frontline 'Our lives begin to end the day we become silent about the things that mat= ter' is a quote from Dr Martin Luther King Jr. [http://origin.ih.constantco= ntact.com/fs007/1101938345415/img/283.jpg?a=3D1102143873228] This was the t= itle of a recent presentation I gave at the Shared Parenting Council's rece= nt national conference. The actual title of the talk was, 'The Things that = Matter and the Way Forward'. Finding a way forward is usually the greatest = challenge. Martin Luther King Jr was born on 15 January 1929 in Atlanta, Georgia, USA.= He was christened Michael Luther King Jr, but later had his name changed t= o Martin. His father and maternal grandfather were Baptist preachers with h= istories of civil rights activity. His great grandfather was also a preache= r. As a boy King experienced the racial discrimination of the time. On one = occasion he and his schoolteacher were ordered to give up their seats to wh= ite passengers during a lengthy bus ride. "When we didn't move right away, = the driver started cursing us out and calling us black sons of b*tches," Ki= ng later recalled. "I decided not to move at all, but my teacher pointed ou= t that we must obey the law. So we got up and stood in the aisle the whole = 90 miles to Atlanta, It was a night I'll never forget. I don't think I have= ever been so deeply angry in my life." Sometimes anger can be a great motivator. Anger against injustice is often = the driving force behind social change as in the case of the suffragettes i= n the early days of the women's movement. There is such a thing as 'just' a= nger. Sometimes it is only anger that breaks apathy. The scriptures say it = well, 'Be angry and sin not'. The main problem with anger if uncontrolled i= s that it can lead to bitterness and violence. Dr Martin Luther King Jr was inspired by the teachings of Jesus Christ and = the non-violent protests of Mahatma Gandhi. On 1st December 1955 in Montgom= ery, Alabama, a local African-American woman named Rosa Parks was arrested = for refusing to surrender her bus seat to a white passenger. Black activist= s formed the Montgomery Improvement Association to boycott the transport sy= stem and chose King as their leader. The boycott took effect on 5th Decembe= r. That night King addressed the protesters: "We have sometimes given our w= hite brothers the feeling that we liked the way we were being treated," he = said. "But we come here tonight to be saved from that patience that makes u= s patient with anything less than freedom and justice. . . . Our method wi= ll be that of persuasion not coercion. We will only say to the people, "Let= your conscience be your guide'. The boycott continued for 381 days until the Montgomery buses desegregated,= after the US Supreme Court declared Alabama's segregation laws unconstitut= ional. During the boycott King was arrested and his home bombed. When in th= e aftermath of the bombing it appeared that rioting might break out, King c= alled for non-violent protest and calmed the community. Dr Martin Luther King Jr said in one of his speeches, "Darkness cannot driv= e out darkness; only light can do that. Hate cannot drive out hate; only lo= ve can do that." King didn't just say those words, he lived them. In 1963, = talking about the many death threats that he had received, he said, "It's t= he quality, not the longevity of one's life that is important. If you are c= ut down in a movement that is designed to save the soul of a nation, then n= o other death could be more redemptive." On 4th April 1968, Memphis, Tennessee, Dr Martin Luther King Jr was shot de= ad while standing on the balcony of the motel where he was staying. Even be= fore his assassination he saw much of what he fought for on behalf of his p= eople achieved but not without cost. His comment on manhood rings in our ea= rs today, "A nation that produces soft minded men purchases its own spiritu= al death on the instalment plan." The battles lines are not as clear today,= but no less intense. The continuing emasculation of manhood, the derogatio= n of fatherhood, the attack on motherhood, the heterophobic hatred of famil= y, the purposeful destruction of marriage, the wholesale and legislated sla= ughter of innocent children through abortion and the anti-male bias in gove= rnment departments never cease to amaze me. Like King I am stirred in my sp= irit. I find his strategy for forward motion deeply inspirational, "If we g= o forward we must go back and rediscover those precious values - that all r= eality hinges on moral foundations and all reality has spiritual control" a= nd like Martin Luther King I will stake my life on it - Will you? Lovework Don't be a soft minded man.[http://origin.ih.constantcontact.com/fs007/1101= 938345415/img/85.jpg?a=3D1102143873228] Reject apathy - accept responsibility. As Mahatma Gandhi said, "Become the change you seek"! Love your children, love your wife and get active in your community. Your community needs fathers that care. Become part of the political process for positive change for our families a= nd our children. Remember King's word, "It's the quality, not the longevity of one's life th= at is important." Yours for the things that matter Warwick Marsh PS During the last election the community of faith and people of goodwill j= oined together to encourage the government to increase Australian aid abroa= d to poorer nations. After increasing that aid the current government is co= nsider actively funding more abortions instead of= desperately needed health care, food and access to water. Register your di= sappointment with this proposed policy change by emailing your politicians = at:Make a Stand PPS Make a donation to help the children today ____________________________________________________________________ Warwick Marsh has been married to Alison for 32 years. He is the grandfath= er of two children and father of five children, four boys and one girl, ran= ging in age from 27 years to 15 years. Warwick is a musician, songwriter, = producer and public speaker who likes to think he can still laugh at himsel= f. Laughter When Kids speak:[http://origin.ih.constantcontact.com/fs007/1101938345415/= img/285.jpg?a=3D1102143873228] 'After the christening of his baby brother in church, Jason sobbed all the way home in the back seat of the car. His father asked him three times what was wrong. Finally, the boy replied, 'That preacher said he wanted us brought up in a Christian home, and I wanted to stay with you guys.' A father was at the beach with his children when the four-year-old son ran up to him, grabbed his hand, and led him to the shore where a seagull lay dead in the sand. 'Daddy, what happened to him?' the son asked. 'He died and went to Heaven,' the Dad replied. The boy thought a moment and then said, 'Did God throw him back down?' A wife invited some people to dinner. At the table, she turned to their six-year-old daughter and said, 'Would you like to say the blessing?' 'I wouldn't know what to say,' the girl replied. 'Just say what you hear Mommy say,' the wife answered. The daughter bowed her head and said, 'Lord, why on earth did I invite all these people to dinner?' Grandfathers [http://origin.ih.constantcontact.com/fs007/1101938345415= /img/286.jpg?a=3D1102143873228] I have a dream that one day every valley shall be exalted, every hill and mountain shall be made low, the rough places will be made straight and the glory of the Lord shall be revealed and all flesh shall see it together. Dr Martin Luther King Jr Single Dads MEDIA RELEASE[http://origin.ih.constantcontact.com/fs007/1101938345415/img/= 290.jpg?a=3D1102143873228] DADS IN DISTRESS INC Thurs 26th June 2008 On Monday 23rd June 2008 Minister Joe Ludwig announced the (GET TOUGH) "The Child Support Agency's Compliance Strategy for 2008-2010: Supporting p= arents to meet their child support responsibilities." At the Child Support = National Stakeholder Group in Parliament House. 1 - Optical surveillance program - Where separated parents tell the CSA they are not working and cannot pay their child support but there is evidence to indicate something else. 2 - Getting to the Assets - A new MOU with the insolvency and trustee Service of Australia. Enforcing payment by selling of assets. 3 - New Tax return lodgement rules - ALL child support parents to lodge tax returns unless income less than $18,252 4 - Salary sacrifice of Superannuation schemes will be added back for calculation of income for Child Support Tony Miller Founder/Director of Dads in Distress Inc who is a member of the= CSNSEG group was present at the announcement and said he was shocked by th= e heavy handedness of the strategy but at the same time understood full wel= l that a small minority were shirking their responsibilities and making it = look bad for the rest of us. The reality is although they are quoting a billion dollars of child support= debt, $231 million of that is overseas debt and $255m is over 4 years old = and some debt dates back nearly 20 years to the start of the scheme. It see= ms the majority is owed from people who are on very high incomes in private= business or companies etc Mr Miller said. While this is no excuse Mr Mille= r said we are all now painted with the same brush when in reality it is a m= inority. Human Services Minister Joe Ludwig said a small proportion of pare= nts were not doing the right thing. Our group promotes that as a divorced dad you have the responsibility to co= ntinue to support your children both emotionally and financially and our me= mbers are doing just that. Unfortunately many are still fighting just to se= e their children even though they pay child support. It's a shame that a si= milar compliance scheme with the same weight has not been rolled out to com= bat the issue of contravention of court ordered access. A smaller program w= as announced recently with little fanfare, nothing as glorious as these new= provisions Mr Miller said. In the meeting Kathleen Swinbourne (Sole Parents Union) said: "Are you real= ly serious about selling out houses from under these non payers, as you hav= e never been serious before?" Matt Miller CSA said: "Selling peoples houses out from under them is a las= t resort. You know, we sometimes loose the metrics that 4 out of 5 parents do the right thing. We are very clearly serious about the overdue amounts. We must have strong underpinning of the new reforms which are set out to make it fairer for both payer and payee. The pay dirt here is to get people with the capacity to pay TO pay. We have hired 120 investigators to investigate cases." The agency is using employment withholding to collect $30 million a month. Tony Miller said: "When you start talking about selling out houses you coul= d ask the same question as to how many mothers will you jail who are breaki= ng the law in non compliance to court orders denying children the right to = see their fathers." The reality is that these new provisions will also catch out those women wh= o are abusing the system so in effect it works both ways. It's about our ki= ds and making sure they are looked after. All Dads in Distress ever wanted = was fairness and equity within the system. Some of us feel it still has a l= ong way to go. And the unfortunate result in all this is that once again the deadbeat dad = syndrome will be broadcast across the media painting us all with the same b= rush. Most dads are good dads who love and support their children and do th= e right thing. Tony Miller Director/Founder Dads In Distress Inc. PO Box J395 Coffs Harbour Jetty NSW 2450 Ph: 66 528113 Ph: 1300 853 437 MOB: 0422 105855 www.dadsindistress.asn.au All You Need is Love RETROUVAILLE The Western Catholic Reporter By ANN LEWIS June 23, 2008 Troubled couples rediscover their marriages. Retrouvaille challenges the social tragedy of widespread divorce. It doesn't have to be this way. Retrouvaille helps couples overcome a marriage gone bad.[http://origin.ih.c= onstantcontact.com/fs007/1101938345415/img/287.jpg?a=3D1102143873228] The wedding was a big affair in the cathedral just nine years ago. They had six bridesmaids, six best men and two priests. The reception was f= or 350 people. Tonight the harsh words and ugly names reverberate in the silence of their = living room. The muffled sobs of the children can be heard coming from the = bedroom. The latest estimates by Statistics Canada (2005) put the risk of divorce by= the 30th wedding anniversary at 38 per cent for the country as a whole and= 41.9 per cent for Alberta (Vanier Institute of the Family). Divorce, especially for couples with children, is not just a personal trage= dy - it is a social crisis. "They say it takes a village to raise a child. = That may be the case, but the truth is that it takes a lot of solid, stable= marriages to create a village," says Diane Sollee, director of the Coaliti= on for Marriage, Family and Couples Education. Retrouvaille (the French word for rediscovery) is creating villages. It is = a program designed to help couples living in the pain of a marriage gone ba= d. It was started in Hull, Quebec, in 1979 and is offered in over 30 countr= ies today. It is a peer ministry - married couples reaching out to other co= uples. Retrouvaille is a marriage program that starts with an intense weekend faci= litated by three couples and a priest. The three couples had all experience= d pain and misery in their own marriages. Retrouvaille is not a two-day miracle. After the weekend, there is a series= of post sessions. The follow-up is very important since it allows a couple= to put into practice the skills they learned on the weekend along with the= support of presenting couples. The final phase of the program is called CORE, or Continuing Our Retrouvail= le Experience. This is an ongoing support group for couples in the program.= The Retrouvaille 'family' meets once a month to help and support each othe= r, since the healing process usually takes a lot longer than just the initi= al weekend and follow-up period. Retrouvaille teaches couples how to communicate, how to trust, how to forgi= ve, how to resolve conflict, even how to fight - yes, how to fight. Couples want hope; they want to believe their marriage can survive. We offe= r them hope because we have been through it and we have survived. Retrouvaille Australia will hold its next course 1- 3 August 2008 in Mulgoa= , follow-up sessions in Strathfield. To register visit the website For more information phone Pat & Barbara Tilden 02 4295 6860 Special Feature Speeches by Dr Martin Luther King Jr Dr. King's speech at the March on Washington in 1963, along with his accept= ance speech of the Nobel Peace Prize, and his final sermon in Memphis are a= mong his most famous utterances. The following excerpts reveal the cogency,= conviction and persuasion of his powerful speaking style. (From the 1963 speech "March on Washington")[http://origin.ih.constantconta= ct.com/fs007/1101938345415/img/288.jpg?a=3D1102143873228] "I say to you today, my friends, so even though we face the difficulties of= today and tomorrow, I still have a dream. It is a dream deeply rooted in t= he American dream. I have a dream that one day this nation will rise up and= live out the true meaning of its creed; 'We hold these truths to be self-e= vident, that all men are created equal.' I have a dream that one day on the= red hills of Georgia, sons of former slaves and the sons of former slave-o= wners will be able to sit down together at the table of brotherhood. I have= a dream that one day, even the state of Mississippi, a state sweltering wi= th the heat of injustice, sweltering with the heat of oppression, will be t= ransformed into an oasis of freedom and justice." "I have a dream that my four children will one day live in a nation where t= hey will not be judged by the color of their skin, but by the content of th= eir character. I have a dream today=BCI have a dream that one day down in A= labama with its vicious racists, with its governor having his lips dripping= with the words of interposition and nullification, one day right there in = Alabama, little black boys and black girls will be able to join hands with = the little white boys and white girls as sisters and brothers. I have a dre= am today." "This hope is our hope. This is the faith that I go back to the south with.= And with this faith, we will be able to hew out of the mountain of despair= a stone of hope. With this faith we will be able to work together, to pray= together, to struggle together, to stand up for freedom together, knowing = that we will be free one day." "...And so let freedom ring, from the prodigious hilltops of New Hampshire.= Let freedom ring from the mighty mountains of New York. Let freedom ring f= rom the heightening Alleghenies of Pennsylvania. Let freedom ring from the = snow-capped Rockies of Colorado. Let freedom ring from the curvaceous slope= s of California. But not only that. Let freedom ring from Stone Mountain of= Georgia. Let freedom ring from Lookout Mountain of Tennessee. Let freedom = ring from every hill and mole hill of Mississippi. From every mountainside,= let freedom ring. And when we allow freedom to ring - when we let it ring = from every village and every hamlet, from every state and every city, we wi= ll be able to speed up that day when all of God's children, black men and w= hite men, Jews and Gentiles, Protestants and Catholics, will be able to joi= n hands and sing in the words of the old Negro spiritual: Free at last, fre= e at last. Thank God almighty, we are free at last." (From the sermon "I've Been To the Mountaintop," April 3, 1968, the day be= fore King died) "...That's the question before you tonight. Not, 'If I stop to help the san= itation workers, what will happen to my job?' 'Not, if I stop to help the s= anitation workers, what will happen to all of the hours that I usually spen= d in my office everyday and every week as a pastor?' The question is not, '= If I stop to help this man in need, what will happen to me?' The question i= s, 'If I do not stop to help the sanitation workers, what will happen to th= em?' That's the question." "Let us rise up tonight with a greater readiness. Let us stand with a great= er determination. And let us move on in these powerful days, these days of = challenge to make America what it ought to be. We have an opportunity to ma= ke America a better nation. And I want to thank God once more for allowing = me to be here with you." "...And they were telling me, now it doesn't matter now. It really doesn't = matter what happens now. I left Atlanta this morning, and as we got started= on the plane, there were six of us, the pilot said over the public address= system. 'We are sorry for the delay, but we have Dr. Martin Luther King on= the plane. And to be sure that all of the bags were checked, and to be sur= e that nothing would be wrong on the plane, we had to check out everything = carefully. And we've had the plane protected and guarded all night." "And then I got into Memphis. And some began to say the threats, or talk ab= out the threats that were out. What would happen to me from some of our sic= k white brothers?" "Well, I don't know what will happen now. We've got some difficult days ahe= ad. But it really doesn't matter with me now, because I've been to the moun= taintop and I don't mind. Like anybody, I would like to live a long life. L= ongevity has its place. But I'm not concerned about that now. I just want t= o do God's will, and He's allowed me to go up to the mountain. And I've loo= ked over and I've seen the Promised Land. I may not get there with you, but= I want you to know tonight, that we as a people will get to the Promised L= and. And I'm happy tonight; I'm not worried about anything. I'm not fearing= any man. Mine eyes have seen the glory of the coming of the Lord." Speech excerpts from: http://www.thekingcenter.org News & Info News Links for Parents[http://origin.ih.constantcontact.com/fs007/110193834= 5415/img/277.jpg?a=3D1102143873228] Daddy Boot Camp - How to be a Dad How Political Correctness threates our culture-The Family [http://origin.ih.constantcontact.com/fs007/1101938345415/img/278.jpg?a=3D= 1102143873228] Give the Kids a Super Boost How to Bankroll a New Addition to the Family __________________________________________________ 2008 Hillsong Conference July 7-11 Sydney Australia This conference is not for the weak or fainthearted, yet it will encourage = and raise those who are to 'be strong and of exceptional courage'. For over= 20 years the testimony of this gathering, has been churches, teams and ind= ividuals whose 'rising' has radically changed the world they influence. Hillsong NIGHTS is going to be phenomenal with an amazing atmosphere of fai= th & celebration featuring some of the world's greatest teachers & worship = leaders. More information and Register here _____________________ Letters Editor's Note: In 2007 the Fatherhood Foundation featured Dr Colin Campbell's breakthrough= book, The China Study, the most comprehensive study on nutrition ever unde= rtaken. We encourage you to check the first posting on the blog below and m= ake comment. Dear Fatherhood Foundation I have been invited by the Huffington Post to start a blog and have done so= . But for it to work, I need lots of interested participants to comment. Co= uld you round up some souls? http://www.huffingtonpost.com/t-colin-campbell/the-china-study_b_107860.htm= l Dr Colin Campbell ______________________ Dear Fatherhood Foundation Loved the story of George Foreman saying 'sorry' to his kids. Will try & ge= t a copy of that DVD to show to our men. Also moved by the story by Stephan= ie Ramage... Julie was in tears reading her story. How do we get many singl= e mums to read this story without causing offence or adding any further hur= t onto their already troubled lives... I pray God may find a way? Thanks Kerry & Julie Medway Dad's Prayer [http://origin.ih.constantcontact.com/fs007/110193= 8345415/img/289.jpg?a=3D1102143873228] Dear God I have a dream: To become a better father to my children. I have a dream: To love the woman of my dreams and Become a better husband to my wife. I have a dream: To change the world one father at a time. Change the world but start with me! Help Us! The Fatherhood Foundation is a Harm Prevention Charity. Fatherlessness and inadequate fathering has been proven to be a source of h= arm. The Fatherhood Foundation helps children by promoting excellence in f= athering. Excellent fathers are in word and deed: responsible, involved, pr= otective, loving and committed to the well-being of their children and thei= r children's mother. If you would like to give financially to the Fatherhood Foundation Public F= und and receive tax deductibility: Fatherhood Foundation Public Fund (Name, address and amount details must be emailed for a receipt for tax ded= uctibility) Westpac Branch Wollongong DONATE ONLINE BSB: 032 695 A/C: 25-5558 Or mail cheque and address details to: PO Box 542 UNANDERRA NSW 2526 AUSTRALIA The Fatherhood Foundation Public Fund is a public fund listed on the Regis= ter of Harm Prevention Charities under Subdivision 30_EA of the Income Tax = Assessment Act 1997. You have received the fathersonline.org newsletter because you have subscri= bed, or you have been subscribed by a friend. If you do not wish to receiv= e future emails, please click the UNSUBSCRIBE button below. Forward email [http://img.constantcontact.com/letters/images/safe_unsubscribe_logo.gif] This email was sent to blane@uow.edu.au, by info@fathersonline.org Update Profile/Email Address | Instant removal with SafeUnsubscribe(tm) | Pri= vacy Policy. Email Marketing= by [http://img.constantcontact.com/letters/images/cc-logo-color-sm.gif] Fatherhood Foundation | P.O. Box 542 | Unanderra | NSW | 2526 | Australia --_000_110214387322811019383454151211898173002scheduler_ Content-Type: text/html; charset="iso-8859-1" Content-Transfer-Encoding: quoted-printable
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30th  June 2008 &= nbsp;     Inspiring Fathers  Encouraging Families Issue 306
The Things that Matt= er
 
Dear Brian,

Welc= ome to the Fatherhood Foundation newsletter and email information service f= or the fathers and families as we present the things that matter.

=09
In This Issue
Frontline...The Things that Matter.
Laughter..When Kid's Speak
Grandfathers...I have Dream
Single Dads...DIDS Media release
All You Need is Love..Troubled Couples Rediscover their Marri= age
Special Feature...Wisdom of Martin Luther King
News & Info..News Links for Parents
Dad's Prayer..A Father's Dream
Next Week&nb= sp;
 'I w= anna know what love is'
 =09 =09
 
Join our Mailing List!
 
Quick Links
T= hought of the Week
3D"MartinA nation that produces soft= minded men
purchases its own spiritual death
on the instalment p= lan.
 
Dr Martin Luther King Jr  &= nbsp;
 
 
Frontline
 'Our li= ves begin to end the day we become silent about the things that matter' is = a quote from Dr Martin Luther King Jr. 3D"MartinThis was the title of a recent presentation I gave at t= he Shared Parenting Council's recent national conference. The actual title = of the talk was, 'The Things that Matter and the Way Forward'. Finding a wa= y forward is usually the greatest challenge.
 
Martin Luther= King Jr was born on 15 January 1929 in Atlanta, Georgia, USA. He was chris= tened Michael Luther King Jr, but later had his name changed to Martin. His= father and maternal grandfather were Baptist preachers with histories of c= ivil rights activity. His great grandfather was also a preacher. As a boy K= ing experienced the racial discrimination of the time. On one occasion he a= nd his schoolteacher were ordered to give up their seats to white passenger= s during a lengthy bus ride. "When we didn't move right away, the driver st= arted cursing us out and calling us black sons of b*tches," King later reca= lled. "I decided not to move at all, but my teacher pointed out that we mus= t obey the law. So we got up and stood in the aisle the whole 90 miles to A= tlanta, It was a night I'll never forget. I don't think I have ever been so= deeply angry in my life."
 
Sometimes anger can be a great = motivator. Anger against injustice is often the driving force behind social= change as in the case of the suffragettes in the early days of the women's= movement. There is such a thing as 'just' anger. Sometimes it is only ange= r that breaks apathy. The scriptures say it well, 'Be angry and sin not'. T= he main problem with anger if uncontrolled is that it can lead to bitternes= s and violence.
 
Dr Martin Luther King Jr was inspired by = the teachings of Jesus Christ and the non-violent protests of Mahatma Gandh= i. On 1st December 1955 in Montgomery, Alabama, a local African-American wo= man named Rosa Parks was arrested for refusing to surrender her bus seat to= a white passenger. Black activists formed the Montgomery Improvement Assoc= iation to boycott the transport system and chose King as their leader. The = boycott took effect on 5th December. That night King addressed the proteste= rs: "We have sometimes given our white brothers the feeling that we liked t= he way we were being treated," he said. "But we come here tonight to be sav= ed from that patience that makes us patient with anything less than freedom= and justice. . . .  Our method will be that of persuasion not coercio= n. We will only say to the people, "Let your conscience be your guide'.
 
The boycott continued for 381 days until the Montgomery buses= desegregated, after the US Supreme Court declared Alabama's segregation la= ws unconstitutional. During the boycott King was arrested and his home bomb= ed. When in the aftermath of the bombing it appeared that rioting might bre= ak out, King called for non-violent protest and calmed the community.
=  
Dr Martin Luther King Jr said in one of his speeches, "Darkness= cannot drive out darkness; only light can do that. Hate cannot drive out h= ate; only love can do that." King didn't just say those words, he lived the= m. In 1963, talking about the many death threats that he had received, he s= aid, "It's the quality, not the longevity of one's life that is important. = If you are cut down in a movement that is designed to save the soul of a na= tion, then no other death could be more redemptive."
 
On 4t= h April 1968, Memphis, Tennessee, Dr Martin Luther King Jr was shot dead wh= ile standing on the balcony of the motel where he was staying. Even before = his assassination he saw much of what he fought for on behalf of his people= achieved but not without cost. His comment on manhood rings in our ears to= day, "A nation that produces soft minded men purchases its own spiritual de= ath on the instalment plan." The battles lines are not as clear today, but = no less intense. The continuing emasculation of manhood, the derogation of = fatherhood, the attack on motherhood, the heterophobic hatred of family, th= e purposeful destruction of marriage, the wholesale and legislated slaughte= r of innocent children through abortion and the anti-male bias in governmen= t departments never cease to amaze me. Like King I am stirred in my spirit.= I find his strategy for forward motion deeply inspirational, "If we go for= ward we must go back and rediscover those precious values - that all realit= y hinges on moral foundations and all reality has spiritual control" and li= ke Martin Luther King I will stake my life on it - Will you?
 
Lovework
 
Don't be a soft minded man.3D"Family_Loving"
Reject apa= thy - accept responsibility.
As Mahatma Gandhi said, "Become the chang= e you seek"!
Love your children, love your wife and get active in your= community.
Your community needs fathers that care.
Become part = of the political process for positive change for our families and our child= ren.
Remember King's word, "It's the quality, not the longevity of one= 's life that is important."
 
Yours for the things that matt= er
Warwick Marsh
 
PS During the last election the comm= unity of faith and people of goodwill joined together to encourage the gove= rnment to increase Australian aid abroad to poorer nations. After increasin= g that aid the current government is consider actively fund= ing more abortions instead of desperately needed health care, food and = access to water. Register your disappointment with this proposed policy cha= nge by emailing your politicians at:Make a Stand  
 
 PPS Make a donati= on to help the children today
     
____________________________________________________________________

Warwick Marsh  has been married to Alison for&nbs= p;32 years. He is the grandfather of two children and father of five childr= en, four boys and one girl, ranging in age from 27 years to 15 years.&= nbsp; Warwick is a musician, songwriter, producer and public speaker who li= kes to think he can still laugh at himself.
Laughter
=     =20
 When Kids = speak:3D"Kids 
'After the christening of his baby brother in = church,  
Jason sobbed all the way home in the back seat of the = car.  
His father asked him three times what was wrong.   <= br />Finally, the boy replied,
'That preacher said he wanted us broug= ht up in a Christian home,  
and I wanted to stay with you guys.= '

A father was at the beach with his children  
when the four= -year-old son ran up to him,  
grabbed his hand, and led him to = the shore
where a seagull lay dead in the sand.
'Daddy, what ha= ppened to him?' the son asked.  
'He died and went to Heaven,' t= he Dad replied.  
The boy thought a moment and then said,  =
'Did God throw him back down?'  
 

A wife invited some people to dinner.
At the table, she tu= rned to their six-year-old daughter and said,  
'Would you like = to say the blessing?'  
'I wouldn't know what to say,' the girl = replied.  
'Just say what you hear Mommy say,' the wife answered= .  
The daughter bowed her head and said,
'Lord, why on ea= rth did I invite all these people to dinner?'  


<= table style=3D"margin-bottom:6px;" id=3D"content_LETTER.BLOCK12" width=3D"1= 00%" border=3D"0" hidefocus=3D"true" tabindex=3D"0" cellspacing=3D"0" cols= =3D"0" cellpadding=3D"5" contenteditable=3D"inherit" datapagesize=3D"0">
Grandfathers
   &nbs= p;              3D"Dream
I have a d= ream that one day
every valley shall be exalted,
ev= ery hill and mountain shall be made low,
the rough places will be made= straight
and the glory of the Lord shall be revealed
and all fle= sh shall see it together.
 
Dr Martin Luther King J= r
Single Dads
MEDIA RELEASE3D"DIDS"
 
 
DADS IN DISTRESS INC&nbs= p;   Thurs 26th June 2008
 
 
On Monday 23rd June 2008 Min= ister Joe Ludwig announced the (GET TOUGH)
"The Child Support Agency's= Compliance Strategy for 2008-2010: Supporting parents to meet their child = support responsibilities." At the Child Support National Stakeholder Group = in Parliament House.
 
1 - Optical surveillance program - Wh= ere separated parents tell the
 CSA they are not working and cann= ot pay their child support but there
 is evidence to indicate som= ething else.
 
 2 - Getting to the Assets - A new MOU w= ith the insolvency and trustee
 Service of Australia. Enforcing p= ayment by selling of assets.
 
 3 - New Tax return lodg= ement rules - ALL child support parents to lodge
 tax returns unl= ess income less than $18,252

 4 - Salary sacrifice of Super= annuation schemes will be added back for
 calculation of income f= or Child Support
 
Tony Miller Founder/Director of Dads in D= istress Inc who is a member of the CSNSEG group was present at the announce= ment and said he was shocked by the heavy handedness of the strategy but at= the same time understood full well that a small minority were shirking the= ir responsibilities and making it look bad for the rest of us.
 <= br />The reality is although they are quoting a billion dollars of child su= pport debt, $231 million of that is overseas debt and $255m is over 4 years= old and some debt dates back nearly 20 years to the start of the scheme. I= t seems the majority is owed from people who are on very high incomes in pr= ivate business or companies etc Mr Miller said. While this is no excuse Mr = Miller said we are all now painted with the same brush when in reality it i= s a minority. Human Services Minister Joe Ludwig said a small proportion of= parents were not doing the right thing.
 
Our group promote= s that as a divorced dad you have the responsibility to continue to support= your children both emotionally and financially and our members are doing j= ust that. Unfortunately many are still fighting just to see their children = even though they pay child support. It's a shame that a similar compliance = scheme with the same weight has not been rolled out to combat the issue of = contravention of court ordered access. A smaller program was announced rece= ntly with little fanfare, nothing as glorious as these new provisions Mr Mi= ller said.
 
In the meeting Kathleen Swinbourne (Sole Parent= s Union) said: "Are you really serious about selling out houses from under = these non payers, as you have never been serious before?"

 = Matt Miller CSA said: "Selling peoples houses out from under them is a last= resort. You know,
 we sometimes loose the metrics that 4 out of = 5 parents do the right
 thing. We are very clearly serious about = the overdue amounts. We must
 have strong underpinning of th= e new reforms which are set out to make
 it fairer for both payer= and payee. The pay dirt here is to get people
with the capacity to pa= y TO pay. We have hired 120 investigators to
 investigate cases."=
 
 The agency is using employment withholding to colle= ct $30 million a month.
 
Tony Miller said: "When you start = talking about selling out houses you could ask the same question as to how = many mothers will you jail who are breaking the law in non compliance to co= urt orders denying children the right to see their fathers."
 The reality is that these new provisions will also catch out those women= who are abusing the system so in effect it works both ways. It's about our= kids and making sure they are looked after. All Dads in Distress ever want= ed was fairness and equity within the system. Some of us feel it still has = a long way to go.
 
And the unfortunate result in all this i= s that once again the deadbeat dad syndrome will be broadcast across the me= dia painting us all with the same brush. Most dads are good dads who love a= nd support their children and do the right thing.
 
Tony Mil= ler
Director/Founder
 Dads In Distress Inc.
PO Box J395=
Coffs Harbour Jetty
NSW 2450
Ph: 66 528113
Ph: 1300 85= 3 437
MOB: 0422 105855
www.dadsindist= ress.asn.au 
All You Nee= d is Love
RETROUVAILLE
The Western= Catholic Reporter
By ANN LEWIS June 23, 2008
 
Troubled couples rediscover their= marriages.
Retrouvaille challenges the social= tragedy of widespread divorce.
It doesn't have to be this way.
Retrouvaille helps couples overcome a marriage gone bad.3D"Wedding
 
The wedding was a= big affair in the cathedral just nine years ago.
 
They had= six bridesmaids, six best men and two priests. The reception was for 350 p= eople.
 
Tonight the harsh words and ugly names reverberate = in the silence of their living room. The muffled sobs of the children can b= e heard coming from the bedroom.
 
The latest estimates by S= tatistics Canada (2005) put the risk of divorce by the 30th wedding anniver= sary at 38 per cent for the country as a whole and 41.9 per cent for Albert= a (Vanier Institute of the Family).
 
Divorce, especially fo= r couples with children, is not just a personal tragedy - it is a social cr= isis. "They say it takes a village to raise a child. That may be the case, = but the truth is that it takes a lot of solid, stable marriages to create a= village," says Diane Sollee, director of the Coalition for Marriage, Famil= y and Couples Education.
 
Retrouvaille (the French word for= rediscovery) is creating villages. It is a program designed to help couple= s living in the pain of a marriage gone bad. It was started in Hull, Quebec= , in 1979 and is offered in over 30 countries today. It is a peer ministry = - married couples reaching out to other couples.
 
Retrouvai= lle is a marriage program that starts with an intense weekend facilitated b= y three couples and a priest. The three couples had all experienced pain an= d misery in their own marriages.
 
Retrouvaille is not a two= -day miracle. After the weekend, there is a series of post sessions. The fo= llow-up is very important since it allows a couple to put into practice the= skills they learned on the weekend along with the support of presenting co= uples.
 
The final phase of the program is called CORE, or C= ontinuing Our Retrouvaille Experience. This is an ongoing support group for= couples in the program. The Retrouvaille 'family' meets once a month to he= lp and support each other, since the healing process usually takes a lot lo= nger than just the initial weekend and follow-up period.
 
R= etrouvaille teaches couples how to communicate, how to trust, how to forgiv= e, how to resolve conflict, even how to fight - yes, how to fight.
&nb= sp;
Couples want hope; they want to believe their marriage can survive= . We offer them hope because we have been through it and we have survived.<= br /> 
Retrouvaille Australia will hold its next course 1- 3 Augu= st 2008 in Mulgoa, follow-up sessions in Strathfield.
 
To register visit the website =20
 
For more information phone Pat & Barbara Tilden 02 4295 68= 60
=09
Special Feature

= Speeches by Dr Martin Luther King Jr
 
Dr. King's speech at the March on Washington in 1963, a= long with his acceptance speech of the Nobel Peace Prize, and his final ser= mon in Memphis are among his most famous utterances. The following excerpts= reveal the cogency, conviction and persuasion of his powerful speaking sty= le.
 
(From the 1963 speech "March = on Washington")3D"Martin<= br />
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
"I say to you today, my friends, so even thoug= h we face the difficulties of today and tomorrow, I still have a dream. It = is a dream deeply rooted in the American dream. I have a dream that one day= this nation will rise up and live out the true meaning of its creed; 'We h= old these truths to be self-evident, that all men are created equal.' I hav= e a dream that one day on the red hills of Georgia, sons of former slaves a= nd the sons of former slave-owners will be able to sit down together at the= table of brotherhood. I have a dream that one day, even the state of Missi= ssippi, a state sweltering with the heat of injustice, sweltering with the = heat of oppression, will be transformed into an oasis of freedom and justic= e."
 
"I have a dream that my four children will one day liv= e in a nation where they will not be judged by the color of their skin, but= by the content of their character. I have a dream today=BCI have a dream t= hat one day down in Alabama with its vicious racists, with its governor hav= ing his lips dripping with the words of interposition and nullification, on= e day right there in Alabama, little black boys and black girls will be abl= e to join hands with the little white boys and white girls as sisters and b= rothers. I have a dream today."
 
"This hope is our hope. Th= is is the faith that I go back to the south with. And with this faith, we w= ill be able to hew out of the mountain of despair a stone of hope. With thi= s faith we will be able to work together, to pray together, to struggle tog= ether, to stand up for freedom together, knowing that we will be free one d= ay."
 
"...And so let freedom ring, from the prodigious hill= tops of New Hampshire. Let freedom ring from the mighty mountains of New Yo= rk. Let freedom ring from the heightening Alleghenies of Pennsylvania. Let = freedom ring from the snow-capped Rockies of Colorado. Let freedom ring fro= m the curvaceous slopes of California. But not only that. Let freedom ring = from Stone Mountain of Georgia. Let freedom ring from Lookout Mountain of T= ennessee. Let freedom ring from every hill and mole hill of Mississippi. Fr= om every mountainside, let freedom ring. And when we allow freedom to ring = - when we let it ring from every village and every hamlet, from every state= and every city, we will be able to speed up that day when all of God's chi= ldren, black men and white men, Jews and Gentiles, Protestants and Catholic= s, will be able to join hands and sing in the words of the old Negro spirit= ual: Free at last, free at last. Thank God almighty, we are free at last." =
 
 (From the sermon "I've Be= en To the Mountaintop," April 3, 1968, the day before King died)
 
"...That's the question before you tonight. Not, 'If= I stop to help the sanitation workers, what will happen to my job?' 'Not, = if I stop to help the sanitation workers, what will happen to all of the ho= urs that I usually spend in my office everyday and every week as a pastor?'= The question is not, 'If I stop to help this man in need, what will happen= to me?' The question is, 'If I do not stop to help the sanitation workers,= what will happen to them?' That's the question."
 
"Let us = rise up tonight with a greater readiness. Let us stand with a greater deter= mination. And let us move on in these powerful days, these days of challeng= e to make America what it ought to be. We have an opportunity to make Ameri= ca a better nation. And I want to thank God once more for allowing me to be= here with you."
 
"...And they were telling me, now it does= n't matter now. It really doesn't matter what happens now. I left Atlanta t= his morning, and as we got started on the plane, there were six of us, the = pilot said over the public address system. 'We are sorry for the delay, but= we have Dr. Martin Luther King on the plane. And to be sure that all of th= e bags were checked, and to be sure that nothing would be wrong on the plan= e, we had to check out everything carefully. And we've had the plane protec= ted and guarded all night."
 
"And then I got into Memphis. = And some began to say the threats, or talk about the threats that were out.= What would happen to me from some of our sick white brothers?"
 =
"Well, I don't know what will happen now. We've got some difficult da= ys ahead. But it really doesn't matter with me now, because I've been to th= e mountaintop and I don't mind. Like anybody, I would like to live a long l= ife. Longevity has its place. But I'm not concerned about that now. I just = want to do God's will, and He's allowed me to go up to the mountain. And I'= ve looked over and I've seen the Promised Land. I may not get there with yo= u, but I want you to know tonight, that we as a people will get to the Prom= ised Land. And I'm happy tonight; I'm not worried about anything. I'm not f= earing any man. Mine eyes have seen the glory of the coming of the Lord." <= br /> 
Speech excerpts from:
http://www.thekingcenter.org 
 News & Info
=
 
News Links= for Parents3D"Daddy
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 3D"Kids
 
 
How = to Bankroll a New Addition to the Family
 
__________________________________________________&nb= sp;
 
2008 Hillsong Conference July 7-11 Sydn= ey Australia
 =
This confere= nce is not for the weak or fainthearted, yet it will encourage and raise th= ose who are to 'be strong and of exceptional courage'. For over 20 years th= e testimony of this gathering, has been churches, teams and individuals who= se 'rising' has radically changed the world they influence.
 
Hillsong NIGHTS is going to be phenomenal with an amazing atmosphere of f= aith & celebration featuring some of the world's greatest teachers & worshi= p leaders.
_____________________
 
Letters
 
Editor's Note:
In 2007 the F= atherhood Foundation featured Dr Colin Campbell's breakthrough book, The Ch= ina Study, the most comprehensive study on nutrition ever undertaken. We en= courage you to check the first posting on the blog below and make comment. =
 
Dear Fatherhood Foundation
 
I have been i= nvited by the Huffington Post to start a blog and have done so. But for it = to work, I need lots of interested participants to comment. Could you round= up some souls?
 
http://www.huffingtonpost= .com/t-colin-campbell/the-china-study_b_107860.html
Dr Colin Campbell
<= /font> 
______________________
 
Dear Fatherhood Foundation
&nb= sp;
Loved the story of George Foreman saying 'sorry' to his kids. Will= try & get a copy of that DVD to show to our men. Also moved by the story b= y Stephanie Ramage... Julie was in tears reading her story. How do we get m= any single mums to read this story without causing offence or adding any fu= rther hurt onto their already troubled lives... I pray God may find a way?<= br />Thanks
 
Kerry & Julie Medway
 
&= nbsp;           &nbs= p;            &= nbsp;           &nbs= p;
 
<= /table>=09 =09

Dad's Prayer

           &nbs= p;             = =3D"Dad
Dear God
 
I have a dream:
To become a = better father to my children.
 
I have a dream:
To love= the woman of my dreams and
Become a better husband to my wife.
&= nbsp;
I have a dream:
To change the world one father at a time. 
Change the world but start with me!
=09
=09
Help Us!

The Fatherhood Foundation is a Harm Pre= vention Charity.
Fatherlessness and inadequate fathering has been pro= ven to be a source of harm. The Fatherhood Foundation helps children b= y promoting excellence  in fathering. Excellent fathers are in word an= d deed: responsible, involved, protective, loving and committed to the well= -being of their children and their children's mother.

 

If you would like to give financially t= o the Fatherhood Foundation Public Fund and receive tax deductibility:

 

Fatherhood Found= ation Public Fund
(Name, address and amount details must be = emailed for a receipt for tax deductibility)

 


Westpac Branch Wollon= gong            = ;         DONATE ONLINE


BSB: 032 695
A/C: 25-5558
 

Or mail cheque and address details to:<= br />PO Box 542
UNANDERRA  NSW&nbs= p; 2526
AUSTRALIA

 

The Fatherhood Foundation Public Fund&n= bsp; is a public fund listed on the Register of Harm Prevention Charities u= nder Subdivision 30_EA of the Income Tax Assessment Act 1997.=

 

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=09
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=09
3D"Safe
This email was sent to blane@uow.edu.au, by i= nfo@fathersonline.org
Fatherhood Foundati= on | P.O. Box 542 | Unanderra | NSW | 2526 | Australia
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