Received: from beru.its.uow.edu.au ([130.130.68.31]) by anubis.ad.uow.edu.au with Microsoft SMTPSVC(6.0.3790.3959); Sun, 20 Jan 2008 09:31:15 +1100 Received: from febris-nat.its.uow.edu.au ([130.130.68.210] helo=febris.its.uow.edu.au) by beru.its.uow.edu.au with esmtp (Exim 4.63) (envelope-from ) id 1JGMDb-00049G-Bn for blane@uow.edu.au; Sun, 20 Jan 2008 09:31:15 +1100 Received: from c3.confirmedcc.com (c3.confirmedcc.com [64.95.77.164]) by febris.its.uow.edu.au (MOS 3.8.5-GA) with ESMTP id HSS49249; Sun, 20 Jan 2008 09:31:10 +1100 (EST) Received: from p1-ws009 (unknown [10.250.0.101]) by c3.confirmedcc.com (Postfix) with ESMTP id 24F0D98C1F for ; Sat, 19 Jan 2008 22:31:05 +0000 (UTC) Message-ID: <1101947312716.1101938345415.1211.9.122173002@scheduler> Date: Sat, 19 Jan 2008 17:31:05 -0500 (EST) From: Fatherhood Foundation Reply-To: info@fathersonline.org To: blane@uow.edu.au Subject: Dads become Grandads - The joy of the Journey Mime-Version: 1.0 Content-Type: multipart/alternative; boundary="----=_Part_243085_1039662349.1200781865121" X-Mailer: Roving Constant Contact 0 (http://www.constantcontact.com) List-Unsubscribe: http://visitor.constantcontact.com/d.jsp?p=un&v=001jm8CFGIzLJHYg-gJRLc-3d90mBLDU8yk0HyYQ54rkuiCS6Db1XZmTA== X-Return-Path-Hint: ESC1101947312716_1101938345415_1211@in.confirmedcc.com X-Roving-ID: 1101938345415.1211 X-Lumos-SenderID: 1101938345415 X-Roving-CampaignId: 1101947312716 X-Roving-StreamId: 0 X-Junkmail-Status: score=10/49, host=febris.its.uow.edu.au X-Junkmail-SD-Raw: score=unknown, refid=str=0001.0A090205.47927A32.01D1,ss=1,fgs=0, ip=64.95.77.164, so=2007-07-31 18:51:00, dmn=5.4.3/2007-11-16 Return-Path: ESC1101947312716_1101938345415_1211@in.confirmedcc.com X-OriginalArrivalTime: 19 Jan 2008 22:31:15.0693 (UTC) FILETIME=[00C739D0:01C85AEB] ------=_Part_243085_1039662349.1200781865121 Content-Type: text/plain; charset=iso-8859-1 Content-Transfer-Encoding: quoted-printable You're receiving this email because of your relationship with the Fatherhoo= d Foundation. Please confirm http://visitor.constantcontact.com/c.jsp?t=3D1101947312716.1211.110217632.2= &m=3D1101938345415&wl=3DF your continued interest in receiving email from us. You may unsubscribe http://visitor.constantcontact.com/d.jsp?v=3D001jm8CFGIzLJHYg-gJRLc-3d90mBL= DU8yk0HyYQ54rkujVhbuetVkUfc8iWQrd7dC8n_loVz7SoWk-D1VNP6Qj1Q%3D%3D&p=3Dun if= you no longer wish to receive our emails. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~= ~~~~~ 21 January 2008 Inspiring Fathers Encouraging Families Issue 283 ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~= ~~~~~ Dads become Grandads The Joy of the journey ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~= ~~~~~ Dear Brian, Welcome to the Fatherhood Foundation new look newsletter and email informat= ion service for the Fathers and Families of Australia and the world. Last weeks newslet= ter created a bit of controversy and this week Warwick talks about the joys of becoming= a Grandad.The laughing baby link is well worth a look ...8 million people can't be wrong. In This Issue Frontline...Becoming a Grandfather Grandfathers... The future is our family. Single Dads...Grateful Neighbour All you Need is Love.. Marriage Matters Special Feature...Dads need to Defrag Dad's Prayer ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~= ~~~~~ Thought of the Week Govern a family as you would cook a small fish - very gently- Unknown ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~= ~~~~~ Join our Mailing List! [http://visitor.constantcontact.com/email.jsp?m=3D11= 01938345415] ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~= ~~~~~ Laughter Perhaps you know why women over sixty don't have babies. They would put them down somewhere and forget where they left them. Watch laughing baby [http://rs6.net/tn.jsp?e=3D00193wL85-aRBjq1b4tEWaR-y46r= ETfh-5kQoOIrF9Y7acYHVxVfk6LdjT-2r-dsFwO_gPbjgR5TiQHW0ANAtVbQscujiFogk8S7k_u= nSub4rdENt9QLvzLhiuFMid8RAGGJgDE1wLRKOLLXzHsZE_4VQ=3D=3D] ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~= ~~~~~ Quick Links Fatherhood Foundation [http://rs6.net/tn.jsp?e=3D00193wL85-aRBj8S6QymTPEH0v= wt-X1cy2UUv_HO7K_TyCrm9Z08kEKYvdInYedsmsNW_vYZR5cNZcWHOiqq0FLulZ2Tq10Xw8Kk3= dlY3jOcCpucD3jPdxCtg=3D=3D] Dads in Distress The Fatherhood Project - Byron Bay [http://rs6.net/tn.jsp?e=3D00193wL85-aRB= g675mCizEOoGbaTXzm51bwmg31cKLBqyrYa_Hiv8kF_B_1Hpbm-NEJvFlxmhgzf6xh4eIXtBusW= Mw-O2VH2FwcAc8vSYt7geywbez6ocog-NwJeFn49vyBBHs2xi6BQ9c=3D] National Centre for Fathering [http://rs6.net/tn.jsp?e=3D00193wL85-aRBjFHeG= oP_34qirgUZCIyX7taWSF4UafSrEu6KTUUZlrc5D9jcDy_anCORsPW4uTBEul0hKSgkFXjaLFfD= 2Bc-PvxHEFjU-XpKaAHLciBrTOTA=3D=3D] Lone Fathers Association of Australia [http://rs6.net/tn.jsp?e=3D00193wL85-= aRBh0epFO6EOddT0RChT2h0YcllfyJYyjQyDeJm2rjDugz09NafTXg7OILwsT3i8Tpt-E3EkYAY= Q3WZ4J1b--W3Z1C-hbu0jE2dD1lbZLQP_nFw2duooWnuZ4] CSA Adverts [http://rs6.net/tn.jsp?e=3D00193wL85-aRBgvNlytpZsmaMtgZ_WX196g1= A4k89W5yGfrKJiXkz-xiPoZbnSfWzJznygDoPIIcswZm-0A-pT2n78XUhcdCK4mKz2wt5Gk0kFg= Vz-_rGERTPw6wPxf6RviZoQDf8gA6FiFrCclqeYQfg=3D=3D] ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~= ~~~~~ Frontline We were having our weekly family dinner together when we received the call = to come to the hospital, as a family, to welcome the two new beautiful grand daught= ers that had just been born. We all eagerly crowded around the phone to hear the cri= es of the new babies. All the new uncles, aunties and grandparents at our home c= ould=20 hardly contain their exuberance as we hurriedly filled two cars for the 10 = minute trip to the hospital. Getting into any hospital after hours can be a challenge, but a kind securi= ty guard allowed this excited and gleeful family through the doors. We were ushered = into=20 the Labour Ward where the sister-in-charge ordered us to pick up the babies= and=20 hold them close. A request we happily obeyed. My daughter-in-law recounted = the story of her amazing birth and how the second twin slipped out only 12 minutes af= ter the first. She was obviously worn out after many hours of hard work, but at the= same time gloriously happy to be holding the fruit of her labour. My son was gr= inning from ear to ear and filled in the blanks for the women present who wanted t= o know every detail. He even got to put on his first nappy while we watched - a no= mean feat for any dad. The first nappy is always the hardest, while the smellie= r ones always provide a challenge to us ' bravehearts' a bit later one. Both famil= ies were busy getting their photos taken with the twins, mum and dad or sending text= messages to family and friends. [Our apologies if you have been waiting for your mes= sage=20 and have not received it. The first week of new parents' (and grandparents)= lives is really quite traumatic - especially when it is twins.] Finally the sister-in-charge indicated it was time to leave so I asked her = if we could share communion and say a prayer of blessing on the twins. She winke= d and said okay. We all gathered around the bed, aware of the privilege that it = was to be invited into the birthing room so soon after the birth. Barely an hour h= ad passed since the twins had been born. As we always share communion and a prayer of= thanks as part of our weekly family dinners, the new parents were thrilled that we= were bringing the celebration and party atmosphere to the birthing unit. I asked who would like to give thanks for the bread and would you believe, = the new mum answered quickly, "I will!" She prayed a prayer of thanks that only a m= other, after carrying twins for nine months through the heat of summer and then en= during four hours of intense labour, could pray. I have watched my wife carry and give birth to our five children and I stil= l don't know to this day how mothers do it. The mothers of this world deserve a tho= usand Mothers Days every year. I believe it is no mere accident of linguistics t= hat 'Mother' is the most popular word in the English language. I quickly jumped in next to say a prayer of blessing on the twins, and to g= ive thanks for the grape juice, and we all gave a hearty AMEN at the end. I felt incre= dibly privileged to be invited to see my grand daughters so soon after the birth= . It=20 was a privilege accorded to our respective family members because we all ho= ld each other in such high regard. Both my son and his wife's families are very clo= se and supportive. This is not a privilege that can be demanded but that has been = accorded to us because of the love we show to each other, and that is how it should = be. It's moments like these in family life that are simply beyond explanation. Love = returns on its investment and the results are 'joy unspeakable and full of glory'. Lovework Enjoy the journey and be happy to work at becoming a better dad. You are mo= re than likely to become a grandad in the process. Remember the awe and joy of your= first child? Childbirth is a deeply spiritual experience. You get to enjoy it all= over again. It some ways it is even sweeter because it is seeing the joy of you= r own children as they produce their firstborn. It always was about the 'next generation'. Having grandchildren proves it t= o you. It might be a slow train comin' but it is a train that is a joy to ride. Th= e birthing process is a miracle for any dad and grandads can take joy in the journey t= oo. Yours for enjoying the journey Warwick Marsh ______________________________________________________________________ Warwick Marsh has been married to Alison for 32 years. He is the father of= five children, four boys and one girl, ranging in age from 26 years to 14 years= . Warwick is a musician, songwriter, producer and public speaker who likes to think h= e can still laugh at himself. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~= ~~~~~ Grandfathers Grandchildren are a grandparent's link to the future, and grandparents are = the child's link to the past. Unkown ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~= ~~~~~ Single Dads Neighbours By Tony Miller My next door neighbour is a lady of perhaps late 60's. I don't know her tha= t well. She keeps to herself and I certainly keep to myself. She doesn't have many = visitors, nor do I. But the other day something happened, something nice, something b= eautiful. Occasionally we touch each others lives without even knowing it. And someti= mes it doesn't hurt to let these people know that they have. It moved me to write = her a note which is below. I left it on her doorstep this morning. Dear Joy I just wanted to write you a note to say thank you. Yesterday, Saturday mor= ning=20 I was sitting out on my veranda feeling pretty sorry for myself. It was the= n I heard you next door playing the piano. Things of late, my work, my personal life have not been going as well as I = would have liked. I have had lots of decisions to make, many I wish I had not to= . Also a friend, one of my men, had suicided a couple of days before Christmas. An= d, well you know how life seems to catch up with you. Sometimes you just want to th= row the towel in and give up. And you see Joy, being an every second weekend dad, I had my son for the fi= rst half of the Christmas holidays and he was due to go back Saturday afternoon. And= so here I was sitting on my veranda Saturday morning, thinking about my aloneness, = my lot, myself, when I heard your beautiful playing of the piano. By the time you h= ad finished playing a few melodies which I knew but couldn't name, I had tears rolling = down=20 my face. Not tears of sadness but of thankfulness. You see Joy the sound of your beautiful playing made me realise the beautif= ul things that were around me. As I sat listening to you and watched the birds collec= ting=20 seed, the bees looking for nectar, the flowers, the sun, the shadows, life.= And=20 the fact that how fortunate I was that I had this lovely lady right next do= or who could play the piano so beautifully. The reality was I was blessed, I just = didn't know it. After all, I woke up this morning, that was a blessing all on its = own.=20 I had my beautiful son asleep inside and even though it was our last day to= gether I had the rest of the day with him and I would see him again God willing in= a month. You made me reach for the Good Book which I hadn't done for a while and you= made me start thanking the Big Fella for all the good that I did have in my lif= e, including a piano playing neighbour. So this note is simply to say thanks Joy, thanks= and=20 please keep playing. Your grateful neighbour Tony __________________________ A week ago I sent the story above to the Fatherhood Foundation, not really = understanding why I had even written it. Then just the other day the Big Fella, as usual,= decided it was time to send me another life lesson. He is good at that. The lesson = came=20 in the words of a great man, Walt Disney. Walt Disney was reported to have said that there are three kinds of people = in the world. There are well-poisoners who discourage others, stomp on their creat= ivity, and tell them what they can't do. There are lawn-mowers, people who have go= od intentions but are self-absorbed, who mow their own lawns but never help others. And t= here=20 are life-enhancers. This last category contains people who reach out to enr= ich the lives of others, who lift them up and inspire them. I guess I had become a bit of a lawn-mower, maybe even a well-poisoner. I h= ad become so caught up in my own stuff I hadn't thought to stop and look around at wh= at was happening to those around me. I had become a bit battle weary, a bit cynica= l towards others. Joy was a life-enhancer even though she didn't know it. I was tryin= g to=20 be, by writing her a little note even though I didn't realise it at the tim= e. We all play a part in this. It's our duty to try and become life-enhancers,= misery takes no holidays and we see plenty of that in this game. The key is to loo= k at=20 our fellow man and see if in some small way we can enhance his or hers life= . We=20 have a choice, be a well-poisoner, a lawn-mower or a life-enhancer. I wanna= be a life enhancer, I know its going to take time and loads of practice but tha= t's where I want to be. And I guess that is where the Big fella was pointing me... An= d You? Tony www.dadsindistress.asn.au [http://rs6.net/tn.jsp?e=3D00193wL85-aRBif7CSkBah= 6SNowiVPk2IBT6O1P35eZj2CBnalNyefXdbglI34ftok5E2OkGnZTWFPIcOXmLbhl6M-8-5mDbI= Ry8NFa9Hen7eGyTindROkjIGV1sLKyBnjV] ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~= ~~~~~ All you need is Love Marriage Matters: Marriage, the magic wonder drug By James and Audora Burg, Sturgis Journal January 11, 2008 What if there were a magic wonder drug that could confer all of the followi= ng benefits: - Increase life expectancy - Lower a cancer patient's risk of dying from the disease - Lower a surgical patient's risk of dying in the hospital - Strengthen the immune system - Decrease rates of schizophrenia, alcoholism and suicide - Improve sex life, both frequency and quality The marketing campaign for such a magic pill would be almost too easy, espe= cially this month. January is stereotypically the most health-conscious time of th= e year, when people often start diets or hit the gym with fresh resolve. Imagine the sales pitch: "Want a longer, healthier, more satisfying life, b= oth in and out of bed? It's easy. Get a healthy marriage." This association betwee= n marriage and health was first reported in the '70s. "Oh," you say. Some may receive that as a tough message, especially in Janu= ary,=20 a month marked by the greatest number of divorce filings in the year. Clearly, not everyone agrees with marriage as miracle cure, but evidence ac= cumulated since then suggests that it might be, at least for men. Research and statis= tics=20 are there to back it up. Heart disease may reduce a man's life expectancy b= y six years, but bachelorhood takes 10 years off a man's expected life span. But what if you are married, and the marriage isn't healthy? What then? According to researcher John Gottman, an unhappy marriage can increase the = chances of illness by 35 percent, but that working on a marriage every day does mor= e to=20 promote health and longevity than working out at a health club. It seems the unhealthy outcomes vary between men and women. While results o= f one study indicated marital stress may double a person's risk of developing di= abetes, a study in Sweden showed women in marital distress had a three times greate= r risk of a second heart attack. Gottman is quoted in an article, "If it is a good marriage, the benefits ar= e equally as great for women as for men; for men, just being married confers a tremen= dous=20 amount of benefits." Statisticians Bernard Cohen and I-Sing Lee, compilers of a catalog of relat= ive mortality risks, were quoted, "Being unmarried is one of the greatest risks that peop= le voluntarily subject themselves to." That's certainly a provocative statement. So health and longevity-wise, maybe marriage isn't a magical cure-all. But = it does seem to be the best thing going. James Burg, Ph.D., is an associate professor at Indiana University-Purdue, = Fort=20 Wayne, and executive director of the Healthy Marriages Sturgis program. His= wife, Audora, is a homemaker and free lance writer. They are parents of three chi= ldren and reside in Sturgis. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~= ~~~~~ Special feature Even Dads Need to Defrag By Peter Aldin A Dad I was coaching once lamented about the complete lack of time in his l= ife to think, plan, pray. He lacked "time away from the noise", as he put it. Now this man deeply loved his wife and four kids, he loved his work. But he= was=20 the kind of guy (I think most of us are) who needed regular space just to c= lear=20 his head, get some focus, think ... and even not have tothink! His wife and youngest child had health problems. His job meant 9 hours stra= ight=20 of interacting with people at way-beyond-the-surface level, always giving o= ut. He lived only a few minutes away from home and the trip home was nowhere near = enough time to "change hats" from Worker to Dad. Fellas, if you're lucky enough to be living with your family (ie., not divo= rced=20 or separated), and regardless of whether or not your wife is working or at = home, whether you are a SAHD or a "working" Dad like my friend above (as if stay= -at-home parents don't work!), you need that time out which my friend was missing. (= So does your wife, by the way). I suspect one reason why many men make the detour to the pub or bar on the = way home, or actually stay back in the office when everyone else has left, is just to= have some peace and quiet where they don't have to listen carefully, respond, m= ediate, etc etc. Unfortunately neither of those solutions is really meeting the nee= d. You need time to relax and refresh, to let go of one role before taking on the = next, a way to chill out... Now don't give me that nonsense about being too busy. If your wife said she= 'd been too busy to take the car in for its scheduled service 18 months ago, you'd = go postal on her, so be consistent here, mate. You need a service occasionally too! Here's some thoughts on the how and the what of that: My client above decided at first on ten-minute walks around the carpark at = work=20 during the day. He did this because his wife wasn't yet in a place to accep= t him taking a 30 minute detour anywhere on his way home at night. His workplace= understood: most of them just thought he was exercising, but his mangers knew what he w= as up to and that he would come back into the office with a clearer mind. A bunch of coaching buddies and I have a monthly practise. Some of them cal= l it=20 a Refocus Day, I call it a Defrag Day. Some of them hike. I mix it up betwe= en a=20 favourite sheltered cove/beach nearby and coffee shops, where I can just st= are at the water, or drink good coffee, and think, read, plan, etc. Again, my coac= hing=20 client above revived his own practises of half-days away praying in the for= est at a favourite spot by a stream. One of my friends' Dads had a great routine each night. He would come home,= kiss his wife, say hi to the kids and then retreat to the lounge room with a pa= per (or occasionally with nothing) and just sit for 20 minutes. In that time, his w= ife enforced the rule that no one was to disturb him. And when he came back into the fam= ily space 20 minutes later, he was fully present with them. Once you have a plan, remember this may take talking through with your part= ner,=20 so get ready to sell it, to be vulnerable, to not be immediately understood= . These go with the territory. But this is worth calmly persisting with ... Like most things to do with your inner world, you're only going to get sugg= estions from me rather than a formula. You've got to try some things out, talk some= things out, find your own solution here. The important thing is defrag your head a= nd your life regularly and both will run better. Peter Aldin is founder of Great Circle Life Coaching and author of The Stre= ssedout Parent's Guide to a Happier Home-Life. He can be found at www.greatcircle.c= om.au [http://rs6.net/tn.jsp?e=3D00193wL85-aRBip1gD0l7TmB2tqE-AhTcfLRF5vIBtp65aB= 095NY7kaNHrQ5l0CUEkWu1fV6nIJRvnMJNFZqxr2cRqtTUU4O9hRGiyCag900eHOr5uOB7vVtqV= iWs6K9I47] ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~= ~~~~~ News & info Nappy bag [http://rs6.net/tn.jsp?e=3D00193wL85-aRBidQBO495xbu8tfT3RXuSP5fHa= XJ3i1KnLsP0h2EVv4IoxhUjDi08TYu9BlclnpEdwvjk5ubGh1YR-BbVzNZak-0554ZdHQkjJkmb= T8CXA1RmZXq6B8EHTlQYC6B4W_L9Rg3PsnY5TNTw=3D=3D] Dads Changing Nappies..A lesson in what to do! [http://rs6.net/tn.jsp?e=3D0= 0193wL85-aRBgyAOO7hfkSNuLaB8FCQRJUMNlhfhMv9VMg9OKxisG40vsRx-hnhlqNiYbxzXrcz= 6Aj-bJay1RrE6mUMP7swrj_68S47xFOsQslGz04LnDW0NXflPVnku0yY9qxr7WKLRY=3D] 75 Family Relationship Centres to commence [http://rs6.net/tn.jsp?e=3D00193= wL85-aRBgNlLbAUDUFRb0iGCWbZhO2nnvy14IcBRFdQpfSeyJCScob-SBED3hEC75Q9BggKAgdM= 8iI9XQ7n4gcfIBG1YBkCzhEhf97e5bnIzjTfyPj2RGu4g1HQs9af5v4Ae8GH2oPSQPVAfE7ROB0= HGAND_rDcsKVkDG0PDY=3D] Marsh Family increases population levels in Australia by two>> Letters Dear Fatherhood Foundation Nothing wrong with your new look newsletter, but it's the contents that is = the real winner. Your article on global warming should be posted to all politicians.= I often thought the same thing - children from divorced parents have a TV etc in bo= th their parents' houses, a doubling of resources. The marketers love divorce, Real = Estate salesmen love it too. The reason scientists give weather patterns a name - it gives them some for= m of=20 explanation for it. Jeremiah 3:3 tells us who ultimately controls it all. Dieter _______________________ Dear Fatherhood Foundation I am a widow with two young children and feel that your ad is thoughtless a= nd insensitive to people in our situation. It is hard enough dealing with the fact that my= children have lost their father (especially around Fathers' Day when all the other c= hildren are making cards and gifts for their dads) but to have the fact that they a= re missing out so badly by having their father die being constantly shoved in their fa= ce on TV is just cruel! Why don't men think about anyone else besides themselves= !!! Joanne _____________________ Editor's Note: The Fatherhood Foundation is primarily concerned with ecolog= ical=20 balance of families and healthy personal relationships. Having said that we= are=20 also deeply concerned about our environment. Richard Hutchinson has been wo= rking on a clean green car that runs on ethanol. Below is his response to last w= eek's newsletter. Dear Fatherhood Foundation The new look for The Fatherhood Foundation is great - much "younger" cleane= r and simpler than the old one. Thought I would mention that re climate change I think you agree with us an= d Tim Flannery etc that Climate Change isn't the real problem but it's too late = to change public opinion. The issue that will "get" humanity long before climate cha= nge is global "nil net energy" from fossil fuels. Climate change is just the sympt= om -=20 the disease is humanity's chronic addiction to fossil fuels. Its amazing th= at the general public hasn't worked this out - well its not really amazing its a c= omfort zone thing - its just too scary for them and there are absolutely no doubts= or valid scepticism in relation to this matter - its pure economics of depletion of = a finite resource requiring high energy input with growing demand and diminishing av= ailability per capita. We have found however that while climate change will never des= troy=20 humanity (as if we don't stop using fossil fuels very soon the collapse of = global economies will come first - and climate will correct itself when people are= gone or dramatically reduced) - people are VERY attached now to climate change = so we are working to bring timelines in the Aust and global public mind closer -= eg 7 years and the drama starts - 2 years to act) pretending as though climate = change really is the issue (though its actually NilNetEnergy which is the problem)= . There just isn't time to educate the global population and its important not to a= rgue=20 with what they believe or they will "turn off" to you - you may find that w= hat others are doing also works better for you - eg ignore climate change and its sill= y debate (is it real, is it caused by humans etc) and instead generate concern and a= ction over the real issue which could wipe out many nations - NilNetEnergy. Isn't it silly for the world to be addressing the symptom and not the cause= of the "dis-ease"? Its probably best addressed as an issue of addiction where hum= anity is the addict and it is experiencing problems in its life because of all t= he toxic oil it is drinking - do we try to stop it having bad gas and digestive issu= es and health failure or do we stop it drinking the addictive product. Having help= ed a=20 few people with this over time I can tell you for sure - that the first thi= ng the planet has to do is - STOP drinking. Then we can worry about why humanity w= ould=20 choose to do this terrible thing to itself in the beginning - I believe the= re are large global "issues" that people need to face as a collective - why do peo= ple have so little respect for their planet that they destroy it and the other creat= ures=20 that live there??? The drinking is just covering the real issue rotting in = the heart of humanity. Sounds like self esteem to me. As the cartoonist Lunig says = - if=20 people weren't depressed in this world there has to be something wrong with= them - the level of depression and anxiety gives the world hope -- people shoul= d be=20 depressed the world is a terrible place getting worse and no-one is acting = - that's depressing. It's the people who appear happy and confident that are a worry= - why are they happy with such a terrible situation? Perhaps they are fools or li= ars or are they truly evil leading their fellow people to doom like some sort of "= fossil fuel pied pipers". I like a line in the iconic visionary Aussie movie MadMax - "We can give th= em back their heroes." Of course many children's heroes are their fathers - it all= makes sense to me. Always seems funny MadMax2 was the second movie I saw with my= Father and the first I chose (before that was 2001 A Space Odyssey which he chose)= - at the cinema just next to the mall in Wollongong. But I diverge (as usual) .= ...<laugh> www.itmdi-energy.com [http://rs6.net/tn.jsp?e=3D00193wL85-aRBjZxxKGtj-nS0jb= HkwzKYt48ypGSXqLnRAgcIsL6gu44oNesACniW97W2T8FGDK-eWKjKqawrrFjuWegHSKBM6MM5X= VKxU3y2tBBpMNE4Sdiw=3D=3D] has some great info on Nil Net Energy so you can at least have your eyes= open as we enter this challenging time for humanity. Interesting to see you address this topic in this way. I hope what I say ab= ove helps you to help others in this desperate time for humanity - just seemed right = to share. Keep up the good work. Richard __________________________________ Dear Fatherhood Foundation A plea for truth and accurate science as the bas= is for public policies in the light of your recent newsletter - Save the Planet. Some people have fears for our future based on believing the following idea= s: =B7 That all sensible scientists agree that global warming is due= to human factors, mainly the emission of carbon dioxide (CO2) from burning fossil fu= els =B7 That global temperature rises will be large, as predicted by = computer models =B7 That global temperature rises and higher CO2 will have bad ef= fects,=20 for example it is claimed that a warmer climate must mean higher sea levels However there is no consensus, and the truth is that: a) many scientists do not agree that human emissions are causing global = warming b) many scientists consider that the global climate system is self-stabi= lizing c) computer models are not a reliable tool, being limited by (i) input = assumptions, and (ii) the accuracy of understanding of the complex processes involved. d) Higher CO2 may benefit agriculture, and a warmer planet may be wetter= not=20 drier. Facts 1 to 9: 1 Global warming has been occurring for centuries, since the mid-1600= s, when a mini "ice-age" caused the Thames River in London to freeze over for a few= winters. 2 It was not till coal-fired electricity generation in the 1900s, and= the=20 widespread use of oil-powered cars, ships and aeroplanes during and after W= W2 that significant emissions of CO2 occurred. Yet the 1950s and 1960s were decades= of cooling, and the warming of the 1940s preceded the increase in CO2 concentrations. 3 Carbon dioxide is only a minor contributor to the suite of greenhou= se gases; water/cloud is the largest factor by far, making the climate system self-st= abilizing. 4 Today's concentration of CO2 is about 375 ppm. Yet Prof Ernst-Georg= Beck has documented many reliable measurements in excess of this figure occurri= ng over a century ago, e.g. 375ppm in 1885 in Dresden and 390ppm in 1866 in Erlange= n. 5 Some of the same scientists now so fearful of global warming were i= n the 1970s predicting and warning that the world was cooling down into a new Ic= e Age. 6 Greenland is called GREENland because from AD1000 to 1400 it was gr= een,=20 with fields and crops. The world being so warm then was not due to human em= issions. 7 During that period the ice around the north pole was far smaller th= an it is now. The Chinese naval fleet that sailed the Arctic in 1421 reported fa= r less ice than now. 8 Despite far less ice in Greenland and at the poles during those cen= turies, sea levels were the same then as now, e.g. William the Conqueror invaded En= gland in 1066 at a historical coastline position that is virtually the same toda= y. 9 The amount of ice near the south pole of the planet Mars is reducin= g in=20 recent years. No emissions of CO2 occur from human sources on Mars. (alien = emissions?!) Question 1: Seeing as the global climate warmed a lot anyway from the mid-1600s till ea= rly-1900s before any significant amount of CO2 emissions, how can it be asserted that= the=20 small amount of global warming in the last century has been due to human CO= 2 emissions? Question 2: Even if the world warms up enough to melt the ice covering Greenland, enabl= ing it to have the green fields it once had in AD1000-1400, then what is wrong wit= h that? Question 3: Could it be that the sun is warming up both Mars & Earth? Granted that the = warmings that terminated the ice ages did not continue unabated, but were self-stabi= lizing and cyclical, could we be going back to a stable situation like that during= AD1000-1400? Lex Stewart lexstewart@optusnet.com.au [mailto:lexstewart@optusnet.com.au] ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~= ~~~~~ Dad's Prayer Dear God Thank you for such moments together as a family So soon after the birth of our grandchildren. Thank you for the miracle of birth. Children and grandchildren truly are a gift from heaven. David said in Psalm 139: For you created my inmost being You knit me together in my mother's womb. I praise you because I am fearfully and wonderfully made. Your works are wonderful . . . When I was woven together in the depths of the earth Your eyes saw my unformed body. All the days ordained for me Were written in your book Before one of them came to be. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~= ~~~~~ Help Us! The Fatherhood Foundation is a Harm Prevention Charity. Fatherlessness and inadequate fathering has been proven to be a source of h= arm. The Fatherhood Foundation helps children by promoting excellence in father= ing.=20 Excellent fathers are in word and deed: responsible, involved, protective, = loving and committed to the well-being of their children and their children's moth= er. If you would like to give financially to the Fatherhood Foundation Public F= und and receive tax deductibility: Fatherhood Foundation Public Fund (Name, address and amount details must be emailed for a receipt for tax ded= uctibility) Westpac Branch Wollongong BSB: 032 695 A/C: 25-5558 Or mail cheque and address details to: PO Box 440 WOLLONGONG NSW 2520 AUSTRALIA The Fatherhood Foundation Public Fund is a public fund listed on the Regis= ter of Harm Prevention Charities under Subdivision 30_EA of the Income Tax Assessm= ent Act 1997. You have received the fathersonline.org newsletter because you have subscri= bed,=20 or you have been subscribed by a friend. If you do not wish to receive fut= ure emails, please click the UNSUBSCRIBE button below. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~= ~~~~~ Forward email http://ui.constantcontact.com/sa/fwtf.jsp?m=3D1101938345415&ea=3Dblane@uow.= edu.au&a=3D1101947312716 This email was sent to blane@uow.edu.au, by info@fathersonline.org Update Profile/Email Address http://visitor.constantcontact.com/d.jsp?v=3D001jm8CFGIzLJHYg-gJRLc-3d90mBL= DU8yk0HyYQ54rkujVhbuetVkUfc8iWQrd7dC8n_loVz7SoWk-D1VNP6Qj1Q%3D%3D&p=3Doo Instant removal with SafeUnsubscribe(TM) http://visitor.constantcontact.com/d.jsp?v=3D001jm8CFGIzLJHYg-gJRLc-3d90mBL= DU8yk0HyYQ54rkujVhbuetVkUfc8iWQrd7dC8n_loVz7SoWk-D1VNP6Qj1Q%3D%3D&p=3Dun Privacy Policy: http://ui.constantcontact.com/roving/CCPrivacyPolicy.jsp Email Marketing by Constant Contact(R) www.constantcontact.com Fatherhood Foundation | P.O. 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3D"FF
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21  January 2008  &nbs= p;       Inspiring Fathers &nbs= p; Encouraging Families Issue 283
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  Dads become Grandads<= /font>

The Joy of the journey
 
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Dear Brian,
Welcome to the Fatherh= ood Foundation new look newsletter and email information service for the Fa= thers and Families of Australia and the world. Last weeks newsletter create= d a bit of controversy and this week Warwick talks about the joys of becomi= ng a Grandad.The laughing baby link is well worth a look ...8 million peopl= e can't be wrong.
=09=09 =09=09 =09=09 =09=09=09 =09=09 =09=09 =09=09=09 =09=09 =09=09=09 =09=09=09 =09=09 =09=09=09 =09=09 =09=09=09 =09=09 =09=09=09 =09=09 =09=09
In This Issue
Frontline...Becoming a Grandfather
Grandfathers... The future is our family. =09=09
Single Dads...Grateful Neighbour
All you Need is Love.. Marriage Matters
Special Feature...Dads need to Defrag
Dad's Prayer
Thought of the Week
  =20
 
 
Govern a family a= s you would cook a small fish
 =20
3D"Fish"
- ve= ry gently-
 

Unknown

=
=09=09=09=09 =09=09
Join our Mailing List!<= /td>

Laughter

=
3D"Gandma_baby"

Perhaps you know why women over sixty don't have babies.<= /p>

They would put them down somewhere and forget where they left them.
=09=09
Quick Links
 
 
 
 
 
=09
=09=09
Frontline
 =20
 
 
3D"Babies"
 

We were having our weekly family din= ner together when we received the call to come to the hospital, as a family= , to welcome the two new beautiful grand daughters that had just been born.= We all eagerly crowded around the phone to hear the cries of the new babie= s. All the new uncles, aunties and grandparents at our home could hardly co= ntain their exuberance as we hurriedly filled two cars for the 10 minute tr= ip to the hospital.

 

Getting into any hospital after hour= s can be a challenge, but a kind security guard allowed this excited and gl= eeful family through the doors. We were ushered into the Labour Ward where = the sister-in-charge ordered us to pick up the babies and hold them close. = A request we happily obeyed. My daughter-in-law recounted the story of her = amazing birth and how the second twin slipped out only 12 minutes after the= first. She was obviously worn out after many hours of hard work, but at th= e same time gloriously happy to be holding the fruit of her labour. My son = was grinning from ear to ear and filled in the blanks for the women present= who wanted to know every detail. He even got to put on his first nappy whi= le we watched - a no mean feat for any dad. The first nappy is always the h= ardest, while the smellier ones always provide a challenge to us ' bravehea= rts' a bit later one. Both families were busy getting their photos taken wi= th the twins, mum and dad or sending text messages to family and friends. [= Our apologies if you have been waiting for your message and have not receiv= ed it. The first week of new parents' (and grandparents) lives is really qu= ite traumatic - especially when it is twins.]

 

Finally the sister-in-charge indicat= ed it was time to leave so I asked her if we could share communion and say = a prayer of blessing on the twins. She winked and said okay. We all gathere= d around the bed, aware of the privilege that it was to be invited into the= birthing room so soon after the birth. Barely an hour had passed since the= twins had been born. As we always share communion and a prayer of thanks a= s part of our weekly family dinners, the new parents were thrilled that we = were bringing the celebration and party atmosphere to the birthing unit.

 

I asked who would like to give thank= s for the bread and would you believe, the new mum answered quickly, "I wil= l!" She prayed a prayer of thanks that only a mother, after carrying twins = for nine months through the heat of summer and then enduring four hours of = intense labour, could pray.3D"Pregnant

 

I have watched my wife carry and giv= e birth to our five children and I still don't know to this day how mothers= do it. The mothers of this world deserve a thousand Mothers Days every yea= r. I believe it is no mere accident of linguistics that 'Mother' is the mos= t popular word in the English language.

 

I quickly jumped in next to say a pr= ayer of blessing on the twins, and to give thanks for the grape juice, and = we all gave a hearty AMEN at the end. I felt incredibly privileged to be in= vited to see my grand daughters so soon after the birth. It was a privilege= accorded to our respective family members because we all hold each other i= n such high regard. Both my son and his wife's families are very close and = supportive. This is not a privilege that can be demanded but that has been = accorded to us because of the love we show to each other, and that is how i= t should be. It's moments like these in family life that are simply beyond = explanation. Love returns on its investment and the results are 'joy unspea= kable and full of glory'.

 

= Lovework3D"Twins<= /span>

 

Enjoy the journey and be happy to wo= rk at becoming a better dad. You are more than likely to become a grandad i= n the process. Remember the awe and joy of your first child? Childbirth is = a deeply spiritual experience. You get to enjoy it all over again. It some = ways it is even sweeter because it is seeing the joy of your own children a= s they produce their firstborn.

 

It always was about the 'next genera= tion'. Having grandchildren proves it to you. It might be a slow train comi= n' but it is a train that is a joy to ride. The birthing process is a mirac= le for any dad and grandads can take joy in the journey too.

 

Yours for enjoying the journey

Warwick Marsh

___________________________________________________= ___________________

 

Warwick Marsh  = ;has been married to Alison for 32 years. He is the father of fiv= e children, four boys and one girl, ranging in age from 26 years to 14= years.  Warwick is a musician, songwriter, producer and public speake= r who likes to think he can still laugh at himself.

=09=09
Grandfathers
 

3D"Bikey

 

Grandchildren are a grandparent's link to = the future, and grandparents are the child's link to the past.

Unkown
=09=09 =09=09
Single Dads
 

= Neighbours3D"Peeking

By Tony Mill= er

 

My next door= neighbour is a lady of perhaps late 60's. I don't know her that well. She = keeps to herself and I certainly keep to myself. She doesn't have many visi= tors, nor do I. But the other day something happened, something nice, = something beautiful. Occasionally we touch each others lives without even k= nowing it. And sometimes it doesn't hurt to let these people know that they= have. It moved me to write her a note which is below. I left it on her doo= rstep this morning.

 

 Dear J= oy

        &nbs= p;     

I just wante= d to write you a note to say thank you. Yesterday, Saturday morning I was s= itting out on my veranda feeling pretty sorry for myself. It was then I hea= rd you next door playing the piano.

        &nbs= p;    

Things of la= te, my work, my personal life have not been going as well as I would have l= iked. I have had lots of decisions to make, many I wish I had not to. Also = a friend, one of my men, had suicided a couple of days before Christmas. An= d, well you know how life seems to catch up with you. Sometimes you just wa= nt to throw the towel in and give up.

        &nbs= p;   

And you see = Joy, being an every second weekend dad, I had my son for the first half of = the Christmas holidays and he was due to go back Saturday afternoon. And so= here I was sitting on my veranda Saturday morning, thinking about my alone= ness, my lot, myself, when I heard your beautiful playing of the piano. By = the time you had finished playing a few melodies which I knew but couldn't = name, I had tears rolling down my face. Not tears of sadness but of thankfu= lness.

        &nbs= p;   

You see Joy = the sound of your beautiful playing made me realise the beautiful things th= at were around me. As I sat listening to you and watched the birds collecti= ng seed, the bees looking for nectar, the flowers, the sun, the shadows, li= fe. And the fact that how fortunate I was that I had this lovely lady right= next door who could play the piano so beautifully. The reality was I was b= lessed, I just didn't know it. After all, I woke up this morning, that was = a blessing all on its own. I had my beautiful son asleep inside and even th= ough it was our last day together I had the rest of the day with him and I = would see him again God willing in a month.

        &nbs= p;  

You made me = reach for the Good Book which I hadn't done for a while and you made me sta= rt thanking the Big Fella for all the good that I did have in my life, incl= uding a piano playing neighbour. So this note is simply to say thanks Joy, = thanks and please keep playing. &nbs= p;       

        &nbs= p;                  &nbs= p;            &= nbsp;           &nbs= p;            &= nbsp;          

Your gratefu= l neighbour Tony

____________= ______________

 

A week ago I= sent the story above to the Fatherhood Foundation, not really understandin= g why I had even written it. Then just the other day the Big Fella, as usua= l, decided it was time to send me another life lesson. He is good at that. = The lesson came in the words of a great man, Walt Disney.

 

Walt Disney&= nbsp;was reported to have said that there are three kinds of people in= the world. There are well-poisoners who discourage others, stomp on their = creativity, and tell them what they can't do. There are lawn-mowers, people= who have good intentions but are self-absorbed, who mow their own lawns bu= t never help others. And there are life-enhancers. This last category conta= ins people who reach out to enrich the lives of others, who lift them up an= d inspire them.

 

I guess I ha= d become a bit of a lawn-mower, maybe even a well-poisoner. I had become so= caught up in my own stuff I hadn't thought to stop and look around at what= was happening to those around me. I had become a bit battle weary, a bit c= ynical towards others. Joy was a life-enhancer even though she didn't = know it. I was trying to be, by writing her a little note even though I did= n't realise it at the time.

 

We all play = a part in this. It's our duty to try and become life-enhancers, misery take= s no holidays and we see plenty of that in this game. The key is to look at= our fellow man and see if in some small way we can enhance his or hers lif= e. We have a choice, be a well-poisoner, a lawn-mower or a life-enhancer.&n= bsp;I wanna be a life enhancer, I know its going to take time and loads of = practice but that's where I want to be. And I guess that is where the Big f= ella was pointing me... And You?

 

Tony

www.dadsindistress.asn.= au

 

 

All you need is Love<= /font>
 
3D"Happy
=

Marriage Matters:

Marriage, the magic wonder drug

By James and Audora Burg, Sturgis Journal January 11, 200= 8

 

 

What if there were a magic wonder drug that could confer = all of the following benefits:

 

- Increase life expectancy

 

- Lower a cancer patient's risk of dying from the disease=

 

- Lower a surgical patient's risk of dying in the hospita= l

 

- Strengthen the immune system

 

- Decrease rates of schizophrenia, alcoholism and suicide=

 

- Improve sex life, both frequency and quality

 

The marketing campaign for such a magic pill would be alm= ost too easy, especially this month. January is stereotypically the most he= alth-conscious time of the year, when people often start diets or hit the g= ym with fresh resolve.

 

Imagine the sales pitch: "Want a longer, healthier, more = satisfying life, both in and out of bed? It's easy. Get a healthy marriage.= " This association between marriage and health was first reported in the '7= 0s.

 

"Oh," you say. Some may receive that as a tough message, = especially in January, a month marked by the greatest number of divorce fil= ings in the year.

 

Clearly, not everyone agrees with marriage as miracle cur= e, but evidence accumulated since then suggests that it might be, at least = for men. Research and statistics are there to back it up. Heart disease may= reduce a man's life expectancy by six years, but bachelorhood takes 10 yea= rs off a man's expected life span.

 

But what if you are married, and the marriage isn't healt= hy? What then?

 

According to researcher John Gottman, an unhappy marriage= can increase the chances of illness by 35 percent, but that working on a m= arriage every day does more to promote health and longevity than working ou= t at a health club.

 

It seems the unhealthy outcomes vary between men and wome= n. While results of one study indicated marital stress may double a person'= s risk of developing diabetes, a study in Sweden showed women in marital di= stress had a three times greater risk of a second heart attack.

 

Gottman is quoted in an article, "If it is a good marriag= e, the benefits are equally as great for women as for men; for men, just be= ing married confers a tremendous amount of benefits."

 

Statisticians Bernard Cohen and I-Sing Lee, compilers of = a catalog of relative mortality risks, were quoted, "Being unmarried is one= of the greatest risks that people voluntarily subject themselves to."

 

That's certainly a provocative statement.

 

So health and longevity-wise, maybe marriage isn't a magi= cal cure-all. But it does seem to be the best thing going.

 

James Burg, Ph.D., is an associate professor at Indiana U= niversity-Purdue, Fort Wayne, and executive director of the Healthy Marriag= es Sturgis program. His wife, Audora, is a homemaker and free lance writer.= They are parents of three children and reside in Sturgis.

 

Special feature

Even Dads Need= to Defrag3D"Dad

By Peter Aldin

 

A Dad I was coaching once lamented abou= t the complete lack of time in his life to think, plan, pray. He lacke= d "time away from the noise", as he put it.

Now this man deeply loved his wife and = four kids, he loved his work. But he was the kind of guy (I think most of u= s are) who needed regular space just to clear his head, get some focus, thi= nk ...    and even not have to think= !

His wife and youngest child had health = problems. His job meant 9 hours straight of interacting with people at way-= beyond-the-surface level, always giving out. He lived only a few minutes aw= ay from home and the trip home was nowhere near enough time to "change hats= " from Worker to <= span style=3D"FONT-FAMILY: Verdana">Dad.

Fellas, if you're lucky enough to be li= ving with your family (ie., not divorced or separated), and regardless of w= hether or not your wife is working or at home, whether you are a SAHD or a = "working" Dad like my friend above (as if stay-at-home parents don't work!)= , you need that time out which my friend was missing. (So does your wife, by the w= ay).

I suspect one reason why many men make = the detour to the pub or bar on the way home, or actually stay back in the = office when everyone else has left, is just to have some peace and quiet wh= ere they don't have to listen carefully, respond, mediate, etc etc. Unfortu= nately neither of those solutions is really meeting the need. You need time= to relax and refresh, to let go of one role before taking on the next, a w= ay to chill out...

Now don't give me that nonsense about b= eing too busy. If your wife said she'd been too busy to take the car in for= its scheduled service 18 months ago, you'd go postal on her, so be consist= ent here, mate. You need a service occasionally too!

Here's some thoughts on the how and the what of that: 

My client above decided at first on&nbs= p;ten-minute walks around the carpark at work during the day. He did t= his because his wife wasn't yet in a place to accept him taking a 30 m= inute detour anywhere on his way home at night. His workplace understo= od: most of them just thought he was exercising, but his man= gers knew what he was up to and that he would come back into the office wit= h a clearer mind.

A bunch of coaching buddies and I have = a monthly practise. Some of them call it a Refocus Day, I call it a Defrag D= ay. Some of them hike. I mix it up between a favourite sheltered cove/beach= nearby and coffee shops, where I can just stare at the water, or drin= k good coffee, and think, read, plan, etc. Again, my coaching client above = revived his own practises of half-days away praying in the forest at a = favourite spot by a stream. 

One of my friends' Dads had a great routine each night. He would come= home, kiss his wife, say hi to the kids and then retreat to the lounge roo= m with a paper (or occasionally with nothing) and just sit for 20 minutes. In that time, his wife= enforced the rule that no one was to disturb him. And when he came back in= to the family space 20 minutes later, he was fully present with them.

Once you have a plan, remember this may= take talking through with your partner, so get ready to sell it, to be vul= nerable, to not be immediately understood. These go with the territory. But= this is worth calmly persisting with ...

Like most things to do with your inner = world, you're only going to get suggestions from me rather than a formula. = You've got to try some things out, talk some things out, find your own solu= tion here. The important thing is defrag your head and your life regularly and both will run better<= /strong>.

 

Peter Aldin is founder of Great Circle = Life Coaching and author of The Stressedout Parent's Guide to a Happier Hom= e-Life. He can be found at www= .greatcircle.com.au

 

<= u>
 
News & info

 

3D"Nappy
 

 

 
 
 
Marsh Family increases population l= evels in Australia by two>>=20
 
 

Letters

 
 

Dear Fatherhood Foundation

 

Nothing wrong with your new look new= sletter, but it's the contents that is the real winner. Your article on glo= bal warming should be posted to all politicians. I often thought the same t= hing - children from divorced parents have a TV etc in both their pare= nts' houses, a doubling of resources. The marketers love divorce, Real Esta= te salesmen love it too.

 

The reason scientists give weather p= atterns a name - it gives them some form of explanation for it. Jeremiah 3:= 3 tells us who ultimately controls it all.   

 

Dieter

 

_____________= __________

 

Dear Fatherhood Foundation

 

I am a widow with two young children= and feel that your ad is thoughtless and insensitive to people in our situ= ation. It is hard enough dealing with the fact that my children have lost t= heir father (especially around Fathers' Day when all the other children are= making cards and gifts for their dads) but to have the fact that they are = missing out so badly by having their father die being constantly shoved in = their face on TV is just cruel! Why don't men think about anyone else besid= es themselves!!!

 

Joanne

____________= _________

 

Editor's Note: The Fatherhood Foundat= ion is primarily concerned with ecological balance of families and healthy = personal relationships. Having said that we are also deeply concerned about= our environment. Richard Hutchinson has been working on a clean green car = that runs on ethanol. Below is his response to last week's newsletter.

 

Dear Fatherhood Foundation

 

The new look for The Fatherhood Foun= dation is great - much "younger" cleaner and simpler than the old one.=

 

Thought I would mention that re clim= ate change I think you agree with us and Tim Flannery etc that Climate= Change isn't the real problem but it's too late to change public opin= ion.  The issue that will "get" humanity long before climate change is= global "nil net energy" from fossil fuels. Climate change is just the symp= tom - the disease is humanity's chronic addiction to fossil fuels. Its amaz= ing that the general public hasn't worked this out - well its not really&nb= sp;amazing its a comfort zone thing - its just too scary for them and there= are absolutely no doubts or valid scepticism in relation to this matter - = its pure economics of depletion of a finite resource requiring high energy = input with growing demand and diminishing availability per capita.  We= have found however that while climate change will never destroy humanity (= as if we don't stop using fossil fuels very soon the collapse of global eco= nomies will come first - and climate will correct itself when people are go= ne or dramatically reduced) - people are VERY attached now to climate chang= e so we are working to bring timelines in the Aust and global public mind c= loser - eg 7 years and the drama starts - 2 years to act) pretending a= s though climate change really is the issue (though its actually NilNetEner= gy which is the problem).  There just isn't time to educate the global= population and its important not to argue with what they believe or they w= ill "turn off" to you - you may find that what others are doing also&n= bsp;works better for you - eg ignore climate change and its silly debate (i= s it real, is it caused by humans etc) and instead generate concern and act= ion over the real issue which could wipe out many nations - NilNetEnergy.

 

Isn't it silly for the world to be a= ddressing the symptom and not the cause of the "dis-ease"?  Its probab= ly best addressed as an issue of addiction where humanity is the addict and= it is experiencing problems in its life because of all the toxic oil it is= drinking - do we try to stop it having bad gas and digestive issues and he= alth failure or do we stop it drinking the addictive product. Having helped= a few people with this over time I can tell you for sure - that the first = thing the planet has to do is - STOP drinking. Then we can worry about= why humanity would choose to do this terrible thing to itself in the begin= ning - I believe there are large global "issues" that people need to face a= s a collective - why do people have so little respect for their planet that= they destroy it and the other creatures that live there??? The drinking is= just covering the real issue rotting in the heart of humanity.  Sound= s like self esteem to me.  As the cartoonist Lunig says - if people we= ren't depressed in this world there has to be something wrong with them - t= he level of depression and anxiety gives the world hope -- people should be= depressed the world is a terrible place getting worse and no-one is acting= - that's depressing. It's the people who appear happy and confident that a= re a worry - why are they happy with such a terrible situation? Perhaps the= y are fools or liars or are they truly evil leading their fellow people to = doom like some sort of "fossil fuel pied pipers".

 

I like a line in the iconic visionar= y Aussie movie MadMax - "We can give them back their heroes."  Of cour= se many children's heroes are their fathers - it all makes sense to me.&nbs= p; Always seems funny MadMax2 was the second movie I saw with my Fathe= r and the first I chose (before that was 2001 A Space Odyssey which he chos= e) - at the cinema just next to the mall in Wollongong. But I diverge (as u= sual) ....<laugh>

 

www.itmdi-en= ergy.com    has some great info on Nil Net Energy= so you can at least have your eyes open as we enter this challenging time = for humanity.

 

Interesting to see you address this = topic in this way. I hope what I say above helps you to help others in this= desperate time for humanity - just seemed right to share.

 

Keep up the good work.

Richard

__________________________________

Dear Fatherhood F= oundation

 

A plea for truth = and accurate science as the basis for public policies in the light of your = recent newsletter - Save the Planet.

 

Some people have fears for our future= based on believing the following ideas:

=B7      &nbs= p;     That all sensible scie= ntists agree that global warming is due to human factors, mainly the emissi= on of carbon dioxide (CO2) from burning fossil fuels

=B7      &nbs= p;     That global temperatur= e rises will be large, as predicted by computer models

=B7      &nbs= p;     That global temperatur= e rises and higher CO2 will have bad effects, for example it is = claimed that a warmer climate must mean higher sea levels

 

However there is no consensus, and th= e truth is that:

a)     = many scientists do not agree that human emissions are causing g= lobal warming

b)     = many scientists consider that the global climate system is self= -stabilizing

c)      <= /span>computer models are not a reliable tool, being limited by= (i) input assumptions, and (ii) the accuracy of understanding of the compl= ex processes involved.

d)     = Higher CO2 may benefit agriculture, and a warmer pla= net may be wetter not drier.

 

Facts 1 to 9:

1&nb= sp;       Global warming has been occu= rring for centuries, since the mid-1600s, when a mini "ice-age" caused the = Thames River in London to freeze over for a few winters.

2&nb= sp;       It was not till coal-fired e= lectricity generation in the 1900s, and the widespread use of oil-powered c= ars, ships and aeroplanes during and after WW2 that significant emissions o= f CO2 occurred. Yet the 1950s and 1960s were decades of cooling,= and the warming of the 1940s preceded the increase in CO2 concentrations.

3&nb= sp;       Carbon dioxide is only a min= or contributor to the suite of greenhouse gases; water/cloud is the largest= factor by far, making the climate system self-stabilizing.

4&nb= sp;       Today's concentration of CO<= sub>2 is about 375 ppm.  Yet Prof Ernst-Georg Beck has documented many reliable measurement= s in excess of this figure occurring over a century ago, e.g. 375ppm in 188= 5 in Dresden and 390ppm in 1866 in Erlangen.

5&nb= sp;       Some of the same scientists = now so fearful of global warming were in the 1970s predicting and warning t= hat the world was cooling down into a new Ice Age.

6&nb= sp;       Greenland is called GREENlan= d because from AD1000 to 1400 it was green, with fields and crops.  The world being so warm then was not= due to human emissions. 

7&nb= sp;       During that period the ice a= round the north pole was far smaller than it is now.  The Chinese naval fleet that sailed the Arctic in = 1421 reported far less ice than now.

8&nb= sp;       Despite far less ice in Gree= nland and at the poles during those centuries, sea levels were the same the= n as now, e.g. William the Conqueror invaded England in 1066 at a historica= l coastline position that is virtually the same today.

9&nb= sp;       The amount of ice near the s= outh pole of the planet Mars is reducing in recent years.  No emissions of CO2 occur from hum= an sources on Mars. (alien emissions?!)

Question 1:

Seeing as the global climate warmed a= lot anyway from the mid-1600s till early-1900s before any significa= nt amount of CO2 emissions, how can it be asserted that the smal= l amount of global warming in the last century has been due to human CO2 emissions?

Question 2:

Even if the world warms up enough to = melt the ice covering Greenland, enabling it to have the green fields it on= ce had in AD1000-1400, then what is wrong with that? 

Question 3:

Could it be that the sun is warming u= p both Mars & Earth?  Granted= that the warmings that terminated the ice ages did not continue unabated, = but were self-stabilizing and cyclical, could we be going back to a stable = situation like that during AD1000-1400?

 

Lex Stewart

lexstewart@optusnet.com.au

&= nbsp;           &nbs= p;            &= nbsp;           &nbs= p;          =

 

 

3D"TwinsDad's Prayer
 

 

<= font size=3D"3">Dear God

 

<= font size=3D"3">Thank you for such moments together as a fam= ily

<= font size=3D"3">So soon after the birth of our grandchildren= .

<= font size=3D"3">Thank you for the miracle of birth.=

<= font size=3D"3">Children and grandchildren truly are a gift = from heaven.

<= font size=3D"3">David said in Psalm 139:

<= span style=3D"mso-ansi-language: EN-US">For= you created my inmost being

<= span style=3D"mso-ansi-language: EN-US">You= knit me together in my mother's womb.=

<= span style=3D"mso-ansi-language: EN-US">I p= raise you because I am fearfully and wonderfully made.

<= span style=3D"mso-ansi-language: EN-US">You= r works are wonderful . . .

<= span style=3D"mso-ansi-language: EN-US">Whe= n I was woven together in the depths of the earth

<= span style=3D"mso-ansi-language: EN-US">You= r eyes saw my unformed body.

<= span style=3D"mso-ansi-language: EN-US">All= the days ordained for me

<= span style=3D"mso-ansi-language: EN-US">Wer= e written in your book

<= span style=3D"mso-ansi-language: EN-US">Bef= ore one of them came to be.

=09 =09
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